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Things I want to change in me... and ask me questions.
17 years ago
General
I've been thinking a lot about myself lately because of recent emotions I've been having. And well, I came to a conclusion lately and that is... I want to change, no! I need to change. There are certain things about me that I despise, I thought I'd list them here for some reason. Maybe it's so all of you can get a glimpse as to who I am, who I want to be, and what makes me tick. Most or all of these, I'm going to start changing as of now.
1. I need to stop biting my finger nails. I want to be as girly as possible for a boy, but yet I have the ugliest looking finger nails you'll ever see cause I have a horrible habit biting on them constantly, and when I run out of nail... I start on the skin.
2. I need stop chewing on things... If you could see me all the time, you'd think I was teething. I almost always have something in my mouth and my teeth are in horrible condition because of it.
3. I need to stop over thinking things. I analyze everything, I come to conclusions faster then I should and they effect me emotionally really hard.
4. I need to be cleaner. Even though I dream to be a girly boi, I seem to be far from it. Its bad to admit, and maybe too much information for some of you. But I am horrible with keeping my body clean, I only shower like once or twice a week, and I don't wear any cologne or deodorant. Its horrible I know.
5. I need to stop holding my feelings in... This one cost me the person I love most in the world, and it wasn't until recently that I've been able to let my true feelings out. Unfortunately, it was too late, and it hurts... bad. I've never felt such emotional torture before, and I hope to get over it soon and never feel it again.
6. I need to stop drinking energy drinks. I've been drinking two a day for the past two weeks and its causing havoc to my insides and mentally as well.
7. I need to loose weight. Once I moved away from my parents I gained about 30 pounds. Now I need to loose it and get myself to the gym.
8. I need to stop caring about what people think of me. I've always been deathly scared of people finding out that I'm gay, not so much close friends and furs. But people I go to school with and random strangers. My parents sort of know, but they are hurt by it and choose to try and ignore it. I just don't know why I care so much.
9. I've been hinting at this one, and going with the one above this... I want to be more girly. The only girly thing I do right now is cross-dress a bit when I'm around friends I'm comfortable with inside the house. That's it though, I want to give a true attempt to pull it off and feel comfortable and wear it outside and such.
10. I want my art to change. I know I am improving, but I truely don't care for my style, nor do I care for where its headed. I'm going to be spending a lot of time working on a new style cause its becoming hard for me to finish anything cause I don't like certain things about the way I draw.
Well... I'll leave it at that for now. Hope you enjoyed a little bit of whats been going through my head, and maybe you learned something about me... or something you didn't want to know about me XP.
Oh and ask me questions. I'm bored... ask me anything and I'll answer to the best of my ability.
1. I need to stop biting my finger nails. I want to be as girly as possible for a boy, but yet I have the ugliest looking finger nails you'll ever see cause I have a horrible habit biting on them constantly, and when I run out of nail... I start on the skin.
2. I need stop chewing on things... If you could see me all the time, you'd think I was teething. I almost always have something in my mouth and my teeth are in horrible condition because of it.
3. I need to stop over thinking things. I analyze everything, I come to conclusions faster then I should and they effect me emotionally really hard.
4. I need to be cleaner. Even though I dream to be a girly boi, I seem to be far from it. Its bad to admit, and maybe too much information for some of you. But I am horrible with keeping my body clean, I only shower like once or twice a week, and I don't wear any cologne or deodorant. Its horrible I know.
5. I need to stop holding my feelings in... This one cost me the person I love most in the world, and it wasn't until recently that I've been able to let my true feelings out. Unfortunately, it was too late, and it hurts... bad. I've never felt such emotional torture before, and I hope to get over it soon and never feel it again.
6. I need to stop drinking energy drinks. I've been drinking two a day for the past two weeks and its causing havoc to my insides and mentally as well.
7. I need to loose weight. Once I moved away from my parents I gained about 30 pounds. Now I need to loose it and get myself to the gym.
8. I need to stop caring about what people think of me. I've always been deathly scared of people finding out that I'm gay, not so much close friends and furs. But people I go to school with and random strangers. My parents sort of know, but they are hurt by it and choose to try and ignore it. I just don't know why I care so much.
9. I've been hinting at this one, and going with the one above this... I want to be more girly. The only girly thing I do right now is cross-dress a bit when I'm around friends I'm comfortable with inside the house. That's it though, I want to give a true attempt to pull it off and feel comfortable and wear it outside and such.
10. I want my art to change. I know I am improving, but I truely don't care for my style, nor do I care for where its headed. I'm going to be spending a lot of time working on a new style cause its becoming hard for me to finish anything cause I don't like certain things about the way I draw.
Well... I'll leave it at that for now. Hope you enjoyed a little bit of whats been going through my head, and maybe you learned something about me... or something you didn't want to know about me XP.
Oh and ask me questions. I'm bored... ask me anything and I'll answer to the best of my ability.
Question: What was the greatest (video/board/mind) game you played?
Video Game: tie between, Assassins Creed, Battlefield 2142, and Uncharted
Board Game: I can't think of the name of it lol. But you search through a house adding rooms as you go, then once you get so far one of the players turns into the bad guy and you have to complete certain goals to win.
Mind Game: Don't play mind games, lol, they're evil.