I want to apologize to everyone for falling off the planet the last couple of months. A couple of things sucked me in, one work-related, one fun, one... not so fun.

The work-related one was filled with a bit of angst, but mostly just sweating. It seems I've gotten the writing bug, and there are several short-stories, one novella and--argh--seven novels (two different series, set in the same universe) that have been burning their way through my brain, my keyboard and onto my hard-drive. O___0

If anyone has actually read any of the little bits I've posted on here in the past (go back about four years), you might be familiar with some of the characters, or at least the world I've been building. There have been a LOT of changes- most notably the direction the stories are taking and aesthetic things like how the names and language are presented to make them less esoteric for people. In other words, I tried to make shit easier to pronounce. ;-p

It's become a serious writing-effort that will hopefully begin making the rounds of the publishers, soon. A writer no less than Robert J. Sawyer said my writing was good enough to pursue as a serious thing. *faints* Now, I understand that he's a super nice guy- he definitely has that rep- but when you hear that from a fellow who has earned Hugo, Nebula and Campbell awards, the ears perk up and start LISTENING.

There's also the blog, but I only have a few entries in it, right now. If anyone is interested in the carpings of an obnoxious atheist, let me know, I'll post the link.

So, I've been chained to the writing-desk...

The fun one also involve a surprising-amount of angst, mostly me, fighting off my insecurities at having to face a bunch of 1% at a wedding-reception. It seems that family I married into is more that a little wealthy, and I, being what could gently term "Native Trailer Trash" REALLY did not feel like I was gonna fit in.

I'm short, podgy, funny-lookin', have dredz down to my ass, and 'delicate' has never been part of my personal skill-set. So I had to fake it. Heh.

So, me and  kanis went to Goodwill to find some snazzy duds. He relied on my eye for good clothes (here's hoping he wasn't mistaken in doing this) and we managed to find a sweet Italian-wool, hand-tailored, no less, suit-jacket of gorgeousness. Black, pinstriped, and fits him wonderfully.

Finding something for me was a lot harder. When you're only 5' 3" and weigh 220 lbs, finding a dress that fits becomes a nightmare, let alone one that actually looks good on me... *sighs* I have these evil monstrosities of the rubber-industry called 'body-shapers', the Fajete kind from Colombia, and I'll tell you, if you don't mind the ten-minute workout it takes (and the bruises, later) to get the bastard on, you won't regret it. Four inches off the waist, everything nipped in and smooth and I'm curvy again! Yay.

I did find a dress, that wasn't too bad- not quite as swank as I'd hoped, but it would have to do. I ended up not even wearing it and wore my pretty Gothic Lolita thing instead. LOL Everyone loved it. I did make some small concession to the 'norms' and bound up my funky dredz into a snood that I made out of black silk burnout fabric that looks pretty sweet, put on some simple jewellery, painted my claws, even painted my face. Dang Tribal customs, Jeesh.

So we go to this massive, multi-million dollar 'home' (I'm sorry, that wasn't a place to live in, it was a place to show off how much money you have!) to schmooze with the extended family and friends of my new cousin who was the groom.

The happy couple had just come back from their honeymoon- an African photo safari (wow) and so the theme of the party was... African Safari, complete with an African drum troupe to lead us to dinner, flower arrangements made up of African species (mostly- there were few that weren't) with feather-accents from Lady Amherst Pheasants (pretty birds, go look 'em up), and I got to get a smooch from a very friendly giraffe named Stanley. I unfortunately cannot remember the name of the young zebra who was there, but he was a sweetie, too. They were animals the party-organizers had rented from a couple of wild-animal training companies. It seems the pair were movie stars. LOL

I didn't do too much talking- I wanted to avoid putting my foot in it- but I oddly had a fairly good time, despite being nervous and more than a little weirded out by the whole 'wild exploitation' feel of the event and learning that my new family are part of the class I've grown to hate with a passion...

Well, crud, NOW what do I do?

The not-so-fun thing is the one that has had me swinging back and forth between 'I don't wanna know' to 'WTH? When are they gonna DO something?'

We drove up to my hometown of Winnipeg to do some 'visiting'- one of the visits being to the local police. Three hours later, I'm wiped, half-panicky, hungry enough to eat a human and I was OUT of there so fast, I left a trail of flames in my wake.

I finally pressed charges against my step-father, the guy who'd raped me for the better part of five years nearly every weekend.

So, I haven't always been in the best of head-spaces. Art certainly took a dive. Other than writing, I haven't had squat for inspiration, urge to draw, make anything or even just goof around. I've been taking care of my little mini-'farm' out on our deck where I have various vegetables hopefully surviving long enough to produce noms.

Anyway, back to the important thing; art. I will finish things, and I have kept to the promise of not taking on any more commissions until I do, so no one gets pushed aside for another commission.

Unfortunately, I don't have a lot of control over the life stuff, so it sometimes gets in the way. *sigh*

So, I'm finding myself avoiding my work-room again, and that's not a good a sign... It's a huge mess- like usual- but slowly getting organized after the tornado of work that went through it for FC. Yeah, it takes me that long to get moving. I try not to say I suck any more, but this time, I think this is all on me. I've been lazy. I've been avoiding responsibilities. I've been scared of the sheer scale of the mess I have to clear out and am overwhelmed to the point where I don't even know where to start. I feel like I've been selfish and unfair to the people who have commissioned me.

No butt pats. None. I don't deserve 'em, so don't do it.

Despite the books' hold on me, I'm going to put them aside for a while, so I can focus on the work-room and get something done down there, and hopefully, clear out some of the pieces I should have finished AGES ago by the end of the summer.

I don't know when I'll be taking commissions again, if ever, but I hope to be back on track, soon.

Assuming that isn't just wishful thinking and I end up making more stupid excuses for why I can't get something done...

So, there you are, a very slim synopsis of what I've been doing the last three months. Doesn't seem like a lot, but every day has been busy, so I must be doing something, right? Right? Dammit.

Also, if anyone has heard anything about a fellow named  jonnyboy8 please let me know? He's been having a hard time of late, including a nasty little encounter with a train where he lost a leg. He's sometimes called Squeekwolf and might be known amongst the Utah Furry crowd. He's disabled his page, here and isn't receiving notes, and I have no other way to contact him. He's been bordering on suicidal the last several months and I've been sporadically talking to him. So any news, or any way to contact him would be appreciated. I want to find out if he's okay.



The commissions and waiting list queue (if I've forgotten anyone, let me know? I know Emien is in there, but I can't recall her/his new icon...

Ok, here's the queue as it stands (and the waiting-list):

 kilroy eight-foot plush of a pal of his

 robbob4 repairs and modification to Big Red.

 dranslin four foot plush of his friend  darkvyce

 thorphax two feet of cuteness.

 trozok21 tail and feets


Waiting-list for plushes, goggles and suit-partials:


 kilroy a firelizard plush.

 scarlitt a pretty striped tail of her dragon.

 reese a large tiger plush.

 dustythemare wants a pair of hooves

 anyadserval suit partial of her pretty Turkish Van Cat (handpaws, feet and head)

 rheiga "his and hers" custom goggles.

 demonlordookami wants a pair of wolf plushes.

 emien can't recall what you wanted, hon. I'll dig it out of old journals.

A friend of  cyberhorn_the_dragon wants a pair of custom goggles.