So, first off, the more I deal with Humanity the more I find I prefer investing in my inanimate objects. And yet I still seek that special person, despite all the drama that search entails and then the drama after you break up hehe, Dealt with quite a lot fo other peoples B.S> this weekend it's funny how everyone has a different side of the story.

In Any event yeah the con...It was a great Megaplex, So I am told, the GOH's had a great time, the room parties were great, some amazing sex was had, huge amounts of alcohol consumed.

And I didn't do any of that. I felt rather isolated this con, like a detached observer more then an active participant.

I saw friends, former, and thought current, interacting with each other but mostly blowing me off, people I like and have history with, walking past me and stopping a few feet away to have a nice conversation with another person. I expect this to a certain extent from some people who are busy running around doing staff things, or en route to do something, but ti happened over and voer and over.

Having to work Saturday from my hotel room taking customer calls and losing my entire Saturday night didn't help. My budget was so tight, I didn't go off site for food with anyone til Sunday, with Jbadger and Keefer as a last minute invite, I declined one invite Friday due to travel complications and finacials. I just most fo the weekend when I did interact the little I did, felt mor elike a tag along, like I had to force myself into the conversation to be noticed.

There were a few exceptions, it was great seeing aurafox again, RJ is always excited to see me for some reason hehe, neko and kryphos paid plenty of attention to me, as did jbadger. Brace is great to talk to when he isn't working his tail off. I got to sit down with Starik quite a bit actually, but mostly on sunday. I visted Rouge several times in the dealers den she always is great, saw and talked with rasroo in limited quantities, but was glad to see her, Taya and Kaser, got to spend some time with them, and hugs always exchanged while passing There were a few more but for the most part my interactions were few and far between shallow and limited

I'm also having a difficult fime finding the middle ground between showing interst and being creepy.

Amethyst for example, still probably my favorite suit at megaplex for 2 years running, and most fo my interaction was encouraged and initiated by Convoy for me. I saw the owner Monday and had a few words, but didn't share my admiration.

Overall watching the fun others were having and the difficulty in finding it myself made ti a rather depressing weekend.

The difficulty in social interaction, and all the stamina I lost for suiting how hard it was to put it on how restrictive the vision was, how it seemed like more effort then it was worth, and the feeling of never suiting at the right time for the attention I want< I hate to bring it up, but I thought a few times, that for the first time I was starting to get a glimpse of how things were for Pandaguy the last few years. I feel the decline in my popularity (ooh popufur) my time away and the age of my suits has created, and considering the fun I had and the experiences I had in my "hay day" it's a lot to adjust to, and I'm not sure how to work my way back up, what's worse, I'm not sure I even want to.

I Don't think I even want the omg you're amazing from strangers, not that i'd mind, I just want a small core group of best buds to explore the con with, or a significant other who is knew to this all or still ahs the energy so I can feed off that, I told a few people this weekend, I think I need a Plus one, for this to be fun again. What I'm doing now just isn't cutting it.

If I've changed, If I am more of a cynical asshole, or if I am excluding depression waves and that's why people are avoiding me, I'm sorry , I don't know how to fix that, but I'm pretty ure it si getting worse.

Highlights: Suiting as CB Roo, had a few good interactions during Funday Pawpet show (sorry I almost took out the mic with my tail)

When RB pulled me in from across con space to the fps band stand for a dance

When the mini suiters saw my Brony shirt and said we're bronies too! and we talked about the show a bit

Learning about Nightmare Nights from Raspberry

The Hot Tub (and my chat with Skippy / blitz

My first and only real meal of con, CHillies with Jbadger

The New Hotel, great ac, decent con space layout, nice staff. GREAT comfortable beds, not having to share a bed...

My 2 hour phone call with my amazing friend.

Seeing Tony Ringtail, I missed that knucklhead

Lowlights: Pretty much everything else.

My Pony shirt walking off

No place to set up a viewing of Equestria Girls, though I may have been told not to or to stop anyway cus of Copywrite issues

Watching the happiness of others, so many couples, so many people having or had babies (shallow right?)

leaving the hotel once

Not having to share a bed....it was mixed, my first con in my own bed I am pretty sure


Thanks to Wuzzle for saving my butt and to some interesting and respectful room mates, no room mate drama is always nice

WORKING