... And why they mean so much to me.

Before I start this, I will warn you that this will be a TL;DR , but I decided because I've been thinking a lot about this lately (and it so happens I'm extremely tired and am having one of those late night thoughts) , I decided I wanted to share.

Hakku and Era have become very close to my heart for reasons that can't quite be explained unless you've experienced as much hardship as I have during my high school years and a little bit before high school as well. Hakku first and foremost, is like the other half of me that tends to show unfortunately. Although Hakku was fully intended to be part of Silver Strain, she was also created during the time of my greatest depression and as well as the hardest time I've had ever in the most vulnerable time in high school. To put it simply, I had a mentally insane step mother that had ruined my dads and my life completely in late October of my Sophomore year. After years of my dad and I having an amazing father daughter relationship, it was instantly stripped away in seconds when I saw him being taken away in a police car for things he's never done. I was left home alone and I've called several friends and family members completely traumatized and scared. No friends picked up for me and my family was far away. I cried for 4 hours from 4 am til 8 am, finally laying on the couch constantly watching the door for my dads arrival back home. I didn't sleep much, and I'm thankful one singale friend took the liberty to pick me up and take me to her house so I could sleep more soundly. My dad did finally come home, but after one night in a cold prison cell, he completely changed from then on. The experience has traumatized me, I have PTSD because of the events that happened. I hyperventilate when I'm near a policeman, and I can't handle any conflict of any kind... Hakku was my escape route, she helped my way out in ways I still don't understand. She is one of the main reasons I'm still here. Her tragic backstory was a way to help me cope with mine, and I couldn't be happier with who she is and why she is the way she is.

Era was created on the terms of me remembering a black cat my mom owned named Shadow. After her death, I've always sort of associated myself as a black cat. In remembrance of her, I decided to name my current cat Shadow as well. Female Shadow tragically died at a young age by either feline Leukemia or because of the infestation of fleas that invaded the house at the time. We're still not sure, but she was an amazing cat. She was my moms literal ninja cat. She would run down the hall, jump and run on the wall and then run down the hallway todo it again. Whenever we watched any kind of ninja movie, she would try to mimic the ninjas and then jump on top of the tv, look on the screen upside down and bat at th bad guy on the screen. She was super special, and that little black cat obviously stuck with me. Era was also created on the basis of being the portrayal of my beauty, uniqueness, darkness, and flirtatious side of me. She is who I basically am, a little of my dark side and a little of my well... Sexy side. I've recently realized, not only does the little blue show me peeking through, it was also the pure white peeking through the darkness. When I created Era, I was finally becoming comfortable with myself again, and I've learned to love again and to trust. Through Era, she may show sadness, but she also shows my light. While she's been in my life, I've learned to just live. She has become the new era of my life, hence her name.

Rolex is simply just a portrayal of my male-like side of personality. His quirky, fun, and silly nature is well... Just me in ways :P

Now it comes down to Click, my latest creation.

Click has always stuck with me for as long as I can remember. She's been hovering over me, watching how I'm doing. I've always wanted to create her, but I just never knew how. As I've said in my latest submission, she is my portrayal of my happiness and joy, she is love, she is what I dreamed to be, she is my curiosity, and she is my freedom. Although she has tiny wings and tiny stature, she's learned to use her magic to float. Through my times of darkness, somehow little Click stood in the corner always with the smile, reminding me of the good things, and teaching me to smile more. Seeing her finally on screen, she gives me happiness and reminds me of all the little things special people have told me. Click has given me more hope, she reminds me that I have a future, and she reminds me to be strong. Her little yellow pupiless eyes are what remind me of rays of sunshine, and that's what she has become, my little ray of sunshine. While fursuiting at the con, her existence finally clicked into my brain. I knew her colours, but nothing clicked until I finally drew it.

I may be an artist, but being an artist also means it gives you freedom to portray anything you want it to be. My muse has been my own battles, learning how to deal with them... Slowly but surely. Being an artist has kept me alive, and it's kept me engaged and purely happy. It's been an outlet for me to create better things, beautiful things, and it's helped me feel free. I don't feel caged whenever I draw. These characters, although they may seem like just characters to you, they are portraits of myself throughout my life; little snapshots. Every step of the way, a new little one appears to help show me the way, and that makes me truly inspired to keep going.