I refuse to kick RedX to the curb due to what is happening to us. Sorry you guys but I had to get rid of You-Know-Who's name on my last journal in case him or some other lackey of his goes to the admins and tattles on me. Better and safer I keep this a secret to non-furiends. Guys...how do I go on? How do I live with the fact I hurt RedX, trying to be a good friend to him but get a cold shoulder from him? I think I deserve it. I deserve much worse for what I did. He is dealing with stuff just like I am. Maybe in time if he feels like it I am ready to listen. Hell if he wants to smack me in the face or perhaps a good kick I could understand. I tried to bring a bad ex into my life and paid the price for that. I broke a relationship with a good man rather cowardly. I am trying to do a better job at work. Hopefully that will help my mind as well. Just know you guys I got my good days and like today I got my bad days too.