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Thoughts on Sochi 2014
12 years ago
I wasn't going to make a drawn out, personal political statement on the situation, but it's come to this:
http://www.advocate.com/politics/20.....ussian-antigay
...and now I feel the need to vent in one of the few places no one from my work or family life will be able to see it.
If you look at that last sentence, you will undoubtedly get the impression that I "have something to hide" or that "I'm not comfortable with who I am in all situations," and you would be correct. The fear of persecution and unfair treatment I would receive at work, (I am a teacher) combined with thoughts about what my more conservative family members might think, some of whom already hold a negative view of our branch on the family tree, have made me guard or obscure my sexuality in certain situations. I admit that this has become a burdening sacrifice.
My sexuality, however, does not define me. I am able to go about most of my day without a thought given about the minority of which I am statistically a part. I eat my breakfast, lunch and dinner without thought to those in the world who would rather see me choke on my food, burn alive and then have my body buried in feces.
One of the things I happen to be passionate about is music, and I can tell you with one hundred percent certainty that I do not think about being a homosexual while I play. The thought has not once entered my mind unprovoked during a single rehearsal or performance of a piece. I do not write gay lyrics, even the romantic ones, because that's what they are - romantic, or about a troubled relationship or emotional situation - not about gayness. And if I were to write a song about gayness, it would still not be about gayness; it would encompass universal feelings of desire of acceptance, social anxiety situations, love and loss...
I would like to think that, in response, no one has ever decided to question that aspect of me during my display of passion, either. Not once has anyone thought to broach the subject immediately before or after a performance, let alone during one. I truly feel that people who appreciate my art do so for what it is, not what I am.
...and yet, these Olympic athletes, whose passion it is to run, skate, play, compete in representation of their homelands, is having to obscure this tiny part of their essence. Yes, I said tiny, for our sexuality cannot and should not define us, but rather our actions should give people cause to judge. This is what Russia and the International Olympic Committee (IOC) is claiming. But these claims are falsely understood; they come from a hetero-normative perspective.
These athletes will have to perform what are literally the greatest physical tasks in the world while keeping one part of their brain focused on making sure they are not too much themselves. They have to be sure not to come off the platform or leave the arena and hug their partner or kiss their smiling, supportive face. They must carefully select their wardrobe, lest anyone think they may be trying to say something that they are not because of who they are, and not because of what they do. And THAT is inherently unfair.
I know that I could not "let go" and "get into the moment" of my music if I had to devote even one percent of my effort at all times to avoid a smirk to my wolf or making sure to skip our post-performance embrace. In the Olympic world, where first place in any race can come down to mere fractions of a second, why should some have to hesitate that long to check their "To-Avoid-Prosecution" list while others less accepting get to barrel on, undisturbed?
Constant anxiety can only hinder performance. I think it's time Russia learned a thing or two about this as political pressure mounts. I can only hope those athletes who can bear to endure this extra pressure succeed, and go all the way. That's how I would like to see a statement made.
http://www.advocate.com/politics/20.....ussian-antigay
...and now I feel the need to vent in one of the few places no one from my work or family life will be able to see it.
If you look at that last sentence, you will undoubtedly get the impression that I "have something to hide" or that "I'm not comfortable with who I am in all situations," and you would be correct. The fear of persecution and unfair treatment I would receive at work, (I am a teacher) combined with thoughts about what my more conservative family members might think, some of whom already hold a negative view of our branch on the family tree, have made me guard or obscure my sexuality in certain situations. I admit that this has become a burdening sacrifice.
My sexuality, however, does not define me. I am able to go about most of my day without a thought given about the minority of which I am statistically a part. I eat my breakfast, lunch and dinner without thought to those in the world who would rather see me choke on my food, burn alive and then have my body buried in feces.
One of the things I happen to be passionate about is music, and I can tell you with one hundred percent certainty that I do not think about being a homosexual while I play. The thought has not once entered my mind unprovoked during a single rehearsal or performance of a piece. I do not write gay lyrics, even the romantic ones, because that's what they are - romantic, or about a troubled relationship or emotional situation - not about gayness. And if I were to write a song about gayness, it would still not be about gayness; it would encompass universal feelings of desire of acceptance, social anxiety situations, love and loss...
I would like to think that, in response, no one has ever decided to question that aspect of me during my display of passion, either. Not once has anyone thought to broach the subject immediately before or after a performance, let alone during one. I truly feel that people who appreciate my art do so for what it is, not what I am.
...and yet, these Olympic athletes, whose passion it is to run, skate, play, compete in representation of their homelands, is having to obscure this tiny part of their essence. Yes, I said tiny, for our sexuality cannot and should not define us, but rather our actions should give people cause to judge. This is what Russia and the International Olympic Committee (IOC) is claiming. But these claims are falsely understood; they come from a hetero-normative perspective.
These athletes will have to perform what are literally the greatest physical tasks in the world while keeping one part of their brain focused on making sure they are not too much themselves. They have to be sure not to come off the platform or leave the arena and hug their partner or kiss their smiling, supportive face. They must carefully select their wardrobe, lest anyone think they may be trying to say something that they are not because of who they are, and not because of what they do. And THAT is inherently unfair.
I know that I could not "let go" and "get into the moment" of my music if I had to devote even one percent of my effort at all times to avoid a smirk to my wolf or making sure to skip our post-performance embrace. In the Olympic world, where first place in any race can come down to mere fractions of a second, why should some have to hesitate that long to check their "To-Avoid-Prosecution" list while others less accepting get to barrel on, undisturbed?
Constant anxiety can only hinder performance. I think it's time Russia learned a thing or two about this as political pressure mounts. I can only hope those athletes who can bear to endure this extra pressure succeed, and go all the way. That's how I would like to see a statement made.
