I checked out that book, but they didn't have my wife and I's love language. There wasn't anything in there about "Irritability and Sarcasm"

Har har. =P

You laugh, that's what attracted me to her in the first place!

Heh. Well, the book talks about a period of being "in love" versus the choice to love someone. The former is an obsession and it's temporary. It fades. The latter requires work and knowing your spouse's love language, and he argues the lack of it is what drives couples apart.

I don't know how far along you guys are. But I think it might be wise to grab a copy of this book and read it, both of you, to help fend off any misunderstandings. And hey, it might help you understand your kids a little too. Knowing their love language will put you on the path to give them the best upbringing you can.

Considering we have two kids and will have been married for six years this October, I think we're ok

*nods* If ya say so. Don't be afraid to get help if things get a little rocky. It's worth keeping the marriage together.

According to the survey in the official website, my primary love language is 'Quality Time.' Oddly, I am most comfortable with expressing love through 'Giving Gifts' and 'Acts of Service.' Inverting these situations just causes difficult times, unfortunately.

*shrugs* It's only a theory, and granted, people are complex, so there may be other things going on. Still, I think it's an advantage to be fluent in more than one love language. I wish to learn all five, however hard that may be, because I love people. All of 'em. Even the worst of society, I still love 'em (though I still think they ought to accept responsibility for their actions). So I figure learning the love languages will help me love people all the more.

I don't think they can solve everything, but they at least allow people to clear the air of one major misunderstanding, and work toward showing their love. That alone gives people a great deal of power. Love can conquer mountains and great seas if it's nurtured and grown. Little wonder the devil fears and destroys it so much. It can be a startling force for good in the worst of times.

No; I mean that I like receiving Quality Time, but I am not good at giving Quality Time. I am more competent in Giving Gifts and Acts of Service, but I do not accept gifts and acts of service with the same enthusiasm. I meant to say that my main Love Language is 'Quality Time,' but I, surprisingly, am fluent in other Love Languages. The survey was actually enlightening to me... explains why I like certain things... nothing sinful, of course.

Who can say? People are people. Just so long as you and those you love understand each other, and seek to show love in all the best ways, things should work out okay. =) Kinda interesting though that you like receiving in one language, but default to others when giving. Perhaps your family had influence on your love languages growing up?

'Giving Gifts' and 'Acts of Service' are concrete acts. 'Quality Time' is too abstract. I do not feel good with touch at all, hence I am not good at 'Physical Touch.' I am not good with words at all, hence I am not good at 'Words of Affirmation.'

I have a gift with words, though not always spoken. And while I appreciate people doing stuff for and with me, it's not exactly what I think of when I think of love. Quality time is definitely appreciated, and I sometimes wish my sister and I had more of it together. Gifts are nice, though they'll feel empty if that's all the person gives me. Touch is... my lifeline, in a sense. I have felt like a total leper at times because no one will touch me.

I once almost broke down in a church because a guy noticed me sitting down and came to check on me. He touched my shoulder to pray and I grabbed onto his hand like it was a lifeline. I'm pretty sure that's a good indication.

*shrugs* It's different for each person. I can only hope God helps me find a wife whose love language is easy for me to speak. Otherwise, the transition from being "in love" to getting back to reality is gonna be a rough one.

'Words of Praise' sound dishonest; I actively reject 'Words of Praise'. I need people to give me constructive criticism, that is, tell me what I am doing wrong and how to make things better.
I already said that I am not good with touch at all, hence I also actively reject 'Physical Touch.'
Although I like 'Giving Gifts', there comes a point in generosity where I feel guilty for receiving all those gifts... worried that I somehow manipulated the other into giving me gifts... worried about things going too fast... do not want to 'take advantage' or even 'deplete' the other... worried about taking advantage of the other's generosity. I do not want to say 'no,' though; I do not want to be inappreciative nor reject how someone expresses love to me.
The same goes with 'Acts of Service.' I appreciate a certain amount, but I want to keep control of things, especially when I was looking forward to do something, especially if this is a task that was assigned to me. For someone to do the assigned task for me has me feel that I am evading my duties...
'Quality Time'... while I am at a frequent loss for words, plus I have difficulty following a conversations in which I have no interest, quality time is one in which I pursue the most. I actually enjoy the idea of quality time. (I even imagine that some furry is beside me when I go to sleep. Nothing erotic happens... just quality time.)
There is also a reason why my Love Languages are this way, but that would be too big a secret for me to reveal right now.

I am not fighting this, though. I just consider this test part of a part to discovery.

I... don't believe I mentioned "Words of Praise" myself, so I'm guessing you're just sharing. I kinda feel like there's a bit of hostility coming up in your first couple lines, but maybe that's just the lack of tone and body language... plus, your icon looks a bit angry. =P So maybe my mind is partially interpreting that as body language. Humans are weird like that.

I understand what you mean about gifts. While I feel it's best to simply accept generosity with neither complaint nor protest, you're right to be concerned about the giver(s) suffering financially. Since Quality Time is your primary, it may come easier for you to sit down and tell them your feelings on the subject. Explain that you like gifts, but that you are fine if they buy something cheaper, give less often, or make something themselves. Or maybe a combination of those options. If you still feel guilty, ask if this emotion comes from yourself, or if it's external. Could be that some givers are dropping subtle clues that they consider you obligated to respond in kind, even if they don't say it (or would deny it if asked). It's also possible that the devil is trying to rob you of your joy of receiving these gifts by making you feel like you don't deserve them, or that you're really a bad person who's convincing people to give while all you do is take.

In my experience, though perhaps it's just an opinion, guilt is often a weapon of the Enemy. What you want is conviction, not guilt. Guilt is saying to yourself, "I am a bad person," while conviction is saying, "I have done something wrong". The two are very different, and I'm convinced God wants to convict people, not make them feel guilty. A guilty person focuses on themselves and their wretchedness, and may spiral into despair, beyond even God's reach (if it gets bad enough, that is). A person who is convicted in his/her heart will strive to apologize, and to make things right as best they can. I would suggest you strive to let God convict you of your sins, without letting guilt creep in to make you question your identity.

('Course, I wrote all that assuming you're a Christian. If not, forgive my assumption, though please do try to pay attention to your thoughts. Very easy to slip into hating yourself.)

Something I noticed though: You say Quality Time is your primary love language, yet you confess to liking the idea of someone sleeping next to you. Let me tell you, it's very hard to have someone beside you while you sleep without one or the other touching. Especially if you're both in the same bed. And while my memory of the book is sketchy, I could have sworn Quality Time required being engaged with the other person. Do you imagine having conversations, or doing something with the imagined furry in your bed? Or are they just present, just laying there next to you, but not engaged? I'm not a counselor though, so it might be better to speak to someone who's better able to help you figure that out. It just sounds to me like maybe you do want touch now and then... it's just that you want it in a way you can control.

In fact, you do seem to talk about control a lot in this last post. Have you gone through times in your life where you had no control over things? Where maybe people, meaning well, took control of a situation that you wanted to handle yourself?

Mmm. Perhaps I should stop. I'm not a counselor, though sometimes I wish to be. Helping people figure out their lives, and their inner thoughts, seems like a worthwhile profession. But then, when would I get any writing done? Sad fact of life is you cannot do everything you really want to do in this life. Perhaps, in heaven, there will be time enough, and death and injury will be a thing of the past.

In any case, I wish you well on your path of discovery. Know yourself, and you will be strong against many temptations. It is much easier to fight sin when you realize the things you do are not who you are... or who you want to be.

...hence why I said that I am not good with words. Granted, the Internet muddies people's intentions, since the written word is limited, yet you are talking to someone who can not read subtleties. (For example, when I bold words, I do not mean to yell; I just want to give something special emphasis, The Legend of Zelda-style.)

I think you already mentioned 'Words of Praise' with the following sentences: 'I have a gift with words, though not always spoken.' Either way, I am just sharing for completeness, since I want to explain all 5 Love Languages.

No; the icon is of a wani who is in a 'bad guy's bar', the wani being startled because Sonic the Hedgehog just literally crashed into the bar. (Take a look yourself: http://www.emuparadise.me/read-maga.....ber_1996/49/21 ) I just thought the wani was good-looking (pause), hence he is my current icon. Then again, I recently got an interest in wanis. [If you though the wani looked angry, try one of my previous attempted avatars: Skin Bolic transforming! http://youtu.be/lakwUVffCUA?t=53s (I am not a fan of the series; I only learned of this through playing osu!)]

Recall that I am not good with words, though you do bring up excellent points.

...indubitably. All I get from other people is just words of praise when I know that there is something wrong with me. Those who do not say words of praise do not give me hints on how to proceed... even saying that I like wallowing in my sorrow (even though I am either at a lack of advice or am simply taking my time to follow the advice while still dealing with real-life responsibilities, since the world does not stop for you).

[I find appropriate to say that I am Christian here, though, for external reasons (I do not mean hiding under a bushel basket, or again, fear of persecution.), I do not share my faith out in the open anymore.]

*lips flatten tightly against each other in a rather straight horizontal line* (If you are going by my icon, then think that I took the cigar out of my mouth, albeit not throwing away the cigar.)
Bandit, you might not get angry or grossed out upon hearing this, or maybe you do. I do not know, but this does not matter. Even if this would, you are not leaving me any choice, though this is my fault for admitting to imagining at my bedside in the 1st place.
I like to imagine fatherly gentle giant furries beside me, at times even imagining the fursona of several people who have such a strong fursona yet whose owner of the fursona is an internet 'friend' with whom I am close in virtual reality. In fact, the fursona would just be my 'friend' in the body of the fursona (Going by my current icon, if I were to be an example, you would end up with a tough-guy gator. However, since I magine the owner in the body of the fursona, I would not end up with a criminal, but rather the guy to whom you are talking right now... a contemplative sort, since I am contemplative.) The thing is that the idea of getting 'touchy-feely' with humans and females is 'gross' to me, hence I end up with imagining big daddy (not in the perverted way) furries. Of course, there is hugging and lots of belly rubbing and other types of massages, but I am usually the one to initiate. (Oddly, I like the idea of a fat-fur squishing me under his fat, albeit with cartoon physics, since I do not want suffocation or internal bleeding.) I like the texture of my imaginary furries, but I want to be in control of the situation. I do not like 'assault hugs' at all.
...nothing perverted, though. The idea of engaging in 'the friendship of the thighs' grosses me out into a shock.
Granted, my imagined 'big furry' time is still 'Quality Time;' there is just the touch response I get without the gross-out. (I can achieve similar soothing results with, say, rolling up on the carpet.) Then again, I receive a feeling of soothing, not necessarily love, through controlled touch. (That would probably explain why I am getting a bit more tactile; I was worried that my furry imagining was getting out of hand, manifesting into the real world, but, not only do I still reject 'Physical Touch' in real life, but I had been feeling more stressors lately, hence I could just been of a bigger need to engage in a proves destressor.

Eeyup. (Usually, the problem is self-control, but your commentary had me notice on how much control I desire of the outside world.)

Mmm. Okay. I'm not a therapist or licensed counselor, so while I can mimic them, I'm rather leery of saying anything further. However, I think it would be wise to think about your desire for controlling your environment, and figure out why you want that. It might also help to bring this up to a real therapist, though I'm not sure how much they might charge. Might be a good idea to ask about such things.

...exactly. I am getting help, but the problem is that I am not only busy with real-life obligations but also need time to prepare before getting help. Recall that I have my own pace with this.

Thank you for your help.

No problem. =) Glad I could be of help!