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Furry: its a dirty habit (relationship exposé)
17 years ago
General
Furry in a lot of ways is my dark little secret. Just like things like I love the thundercats and other various cartoon shows from the 80's/90's. I love all sorts of cheesy shows as long as they're done in a lighthearted non painful way. These are not things I advertize. Furry is more like some dirty habit like someone picking nose and wiping it under the seat. A bad habit to hide.
I'm not saying nobody knows I draw this stuff, All my closest friends do, and its not any serious contention that they have looked through my smutty smut. Though I cant help but feel like a bit of a weirdo. It's like having some sort of wacky perversion and I like it. Must be how those s&m folks feel. It would not be near as much fun if I were advertizing. I like being a bit of a mystery myself.
Though most of the time I might seem like I don't want to really join the furry community. Thats because I don't. I have this wall of "omg the only thing I have in common with these people is that I want to fuck something not human" in the way. Sure there's other common ground I'm sure, but I'm also one to learn from past mistakes, even ones made by others. My former bf had a lot of issues when he tried to join the furry community in his area. By what was said in group chat he believed that it was a sort of sex group. Well, after meeting someone and some things came to light after a lot of mutual touching and some nakedness on his part. (haha, babe I never said any names or locations, so try not to hit me the next time we see each other. Okay you can but just keep it below the chin and above the belt :P) Well, anyway it was pretty much like group ostracization after that.
His naïve mistake is not the problem. The problem is the groups response. Full grown adults acting like teenagers with hot gossip. Honestly if you went to dinner and a movie(and take you back to their place to show you their PORN collection...) with someone and they seemed really friendly, and couldn't seem to keep their hands off of you what would you think? I mean a good portion of gay guys I know personally don't do kissing. Hell I've even been with a woman that hates kissing. So what exactly is the I want to fuck hint? Of course you could just come out right with saying it, but you should not do that(unless you have the charisma to pull it off). It sounds too much like begging to me most of the time, and pity sex is not fun. For me anyway... A tip is to present it in a 'fun something to do' kind of light if you even have to say it out loud.
Social anxiety for my dirty habit. That sums it up. Any experience would be cheepened if I can talk with you so freely about my perversion without forming some sort of relationship out of it. Furry is mostly about sex for me. I don't even touch my best friend on a regular basis(and I've done quite a lot of very illigal crap for that guy), if your going to 'scritch' me a lot expect something to come of it if I like you. Heck even if your just kinda hot :D Thats just how I am.
Which makes me very aware that I would not belong in a regular furry community. This awareness is why it'll take a lot to get me into any regular community event.
However visiting someone who I know that if we hit it off there's going to be a little fucking is good. :D Just had to put that out there to someone. hint hint. ^.^
ninjaedit: I realize this post makes me sound totally slutty. I've only had sex with eleven people in my entire 23 years on this planet(haha but it was a lot of sex with said 11 people most of the time with more than one at a time). Five of them being virgins and I count oral and mutual masturbation as sex. So, nyaaa! Most of the guys I know my age have been with more than 30 people at the very least. Sex is something special* for me. I'm not saying I need a relationship out of it, but its very important its special*. I might as well be masturbating if its just going through the motions. Have I mentioned that I really enjoy masturbation? :P
*special is purposefully vauge because it does not mean moonlit bed of roses, or anything classically seen as romantic crap. Special can be just a great moment doing anything :) in these instances it just happens to lead to a romp.
I'm not saying nobody knows I draw this stuff, All my closest friends do, and its not any serious contention that they have looked through my smutty smut. Though I cant help but feel like a bit of a weirdo. It's like having some sort of wacky perversion and I like it. Must be how those s&m folks feel. It would not be near as much fun if I were advertizing. I like being a bit of a mystery myself.
Though most of the time I might seem like I don't want to really join the furry community. Thats because I don't. I have this wall of "omg the only thing I have in common with these people is that I want to fuck something not human" in the way. Sure there's other common ground I'm sure, but I'm also one to learn from past mistakes, even ones made by others. My former bf had a lot of issues when he tried to join the furry community in his area. By what was said in group chat he believed that it was a sort of sex group. Well, after meeting someone and some things came to light after a lot of mutual touching and some nakedness on his part. (haha, babe I never said any names or locations, so try not to hit me the next time we see each other. Okay you can but just keep it below the chin and above the belt :P) Well, anyway it was pretty much like group ostracization after that.
His naïve mistake is not the problem. The problem is the groups response. Full grown adults acting like teenagers with hot gossip. Honestly if you went to dinner and a movie(and take you back to their place to show you their PORN collection...) with someone and they seemed really friendly, and couldn't seem to keep their hands off of you what would you think? I mean a good portion of gay guys I know personally don't do kissing. Hell I've even been with a woman that hates kissing. So what exactly is the I want to fuck hint? Of course you could just come out right with saying it, but you should not do that(unless you have the charisma to pull it off). It sounds too much like begging to me most of the time, and pity sex is not fun. For me anyway... A tip is to present it in a 'fun something to do' kind of light if you even have to say it out loud.
Social anxiety for my dirty habit. That sums it up. Any experience would be cheepened if I can talk with you so freely about my perversion without forming some sort of relationship out of it. Furry is mostly about sex for me. I don't even touch my best friend on a regular basis(and I've done quite a lot of very illigal crap for that guy), if your going to 'scritch' me a lot expect something to come of it if I like you. Heck even if your just kinda hot :D Thats just how I am.
Which makes me very aware that I would not belong in a regular furry community. This awareness is why it'll take a lot to get me into any regular community event.
However visiting someone who I know that if we hit it off there's going to be a little fucking is good. :D Just had to put that out there to someone. hint hint. ^.^
ninjaedit: I realize this post makes me sound totally slutty. I've only had sex with eleven people in my entire 23 years on this planet(haha but it was a lot of sex with said 11 people most of the time with more than one at a time). Five of them being virgins and I count oral and mutual masturbation as sex. So, nyaaa! Most of the guys I know my age have been with more than 30 people at the very least. Sex is something special* for me. I'm not saying I need a relationship out of it, but its very important its special*. I might as well be masturbating if its just going through the motions. Have I mentioned that I really enjoy masturbation? :P
*special is purposefully vauge because it does not mean moonlit bed of roses, or anything classically seen as romantic crap. Special can be just a great moment doing anything :) in these instances it just happens to lead to a romp.
I'm just kinda glad my hangover after 4 hours of sleep went unnoticed. :D
Can I make you a usericon? Please? *puppy eyes*
The crux of my textwall above is that I'm not the type of person who can hang out with touchy folks without knowing if I can read more into it, if I like you I'm not sure if I can avoid reading more into it. I don't want to hang out and talk about/look at porn in someone elses presence unless its foreplay. I also would like to find other common ground than sexual interest(or subject interest) before meeting someone. I don't go to gay bars, well not to pick up guys anyway. The ladie toristas can be fun though...
I keep going off onto tangents which is sure sign of my hangover, but your friend sounds like he is trying to impose his values on you. Which is not cool. However looking from his perspective he seems to be exibiting a reactionary stance simply because they are not in a perceived cultural norm. Anyone that does not feel how he does is 'stupid' or 'crazy' to compensate for his perceived minority. Humans are not monogamous by nature its just what society and religion have been pushing on us for the past few thousand years. The fact that its still not working on everyone is testiment. Though that doesn't mean its better or worse. Its just not a cultral norm as he is perceiving.
You just do what works for you. If you took his advice and it fucked up your relationship you'd hold it againsed him anyway.