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I keep doing the thing.
12 years ago
I'm ashamed.
For the past few days at work, we were offered bonuses for selling this credit card processing service to business customers. Working in the printing department and therefore having more exposure to these kinds of customers, I managed to nab several of them into filling out the form that would guarantee me those bonus bucks.
And...I blew that extra money on art.
As much as I adore the artists' work, I really, REALLY should not be buying ANYTHING that isn't essential or being put toward getting me out of this house. I don't want to become another Allan Greenwald, but I'm certainly not doing enough to push myself out of that direction. Instead I'm being a tremendous asshole and letting down the people closest to me, who stood by me when I needed them the most, who reassured me and put their trust and sincerity into me.
I'm really sorry. I want things to be better, and you guys put so much faith in me. I don't want to let you down anymore. I don't want to let myself down either.
...anyway, I still have some writing commissions I need to work on, so I'll get on that.
Sorry for being moody.
For the past few days at work, we were offered bonuses for selling this credit card processing service to business customers. Working in the printing department and therefore having more exposure to these kinds of customers, I managed to nab several of them into filling out the form that would guarantee me those bonus bucks.
And...I blew that extra money on art.
As much as I adore the artists' work, I really, REALLY should not be buying ANYTHING that isn't essential or being put toward getting me out of this house. I don't want to become another Allan Greenwald, but I'm certainly not doing enough to push myself out of that direction. Instead I'm being a tremendous asshole and letting down the people closest to me, who stood by me when I needed them the most, who reassured me and put their trust and sincerity into me.
I'm really sorry. I want things to be better, and you guys put so much faith in me. I don't want to let you down anymore. I don't want to let myself down either.
...anyway, I still have some writing commissions I need to work on, so I'll get on that.
Sorry for being moody.
It's nothing to be ashamed about. I understand you want to get out of their but you can't beat yourself up over this, simply learn from it and vow to do better.
"None. I swear."
"..."
"...okay, eight."
"The fifty new submissions on your FA say otherwise."
"HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET THAT LINK"
Hell, maybe I can sell my book and get a bunch of money and THEN get commissions. Who knows. :V