I'm kind of new to this furry thing but I've done role playing and stuff before. I've definitely wasted too much time with friends when I was in college but I've also spent two years in a lonely rainy place where I didn't have close friends.

It's worth it to have relationships and it's worth it to make time to play. I've gone without both and I've looked back and have nothing to show for it. I've actually been more creative when I'm happy.

I do want to accomplish something lasting in the short time I have on this planet. I don't know what it is yet. Probably something software related. Maybe some terrible novel.

Quiet contemplation is lost on a lot of people in today's world, and I salute you for taking the time not just to do it, but to really think about it and share!

Being a part of this community for the short time that I have been active has shown me that you get out of it what you put into it (like most other things, of course). It's a shared common interest, that gives you an "in" to a group of people that you may not otherwise encounter. But once you meet someone, people are people - not necessarily just "gamers" or "furries" or anything else that like. Sure, you'll always relate to people through that common interest. But hopefully, they're also just "friends" or important people to you then, and not strictly related to in the fandom.

We all have to make decisions and prioritize our time and energy in this short life. I tend to think that all determinations of "worth" or "value" are relative. All things are judged based on a comparison to the next-best alternative. Everything we do, in a sense, is a determination that we will derive more pleasure/happiness/value/worth from doing A rather than B, so we do A. See theories of Utilitarianism and Hedonism and Epicurianism. Time is a scarce resource. So how do you allocate it?

From experience I wish I had done some things differently - I think everyone will feel that way at some point. I'm terribly angry at myself for the years and years I wasted worrying, obsessing over things I couldn't really control, hiding from people and things, and telling myself excuses for why I should do this or not do that... But all you can do is go forward, and chalk things up to lessons learned.

But we're all guided by our internal compass and whatever is motivating us and guiding our priorities and decisions at that moment. And that can change. The fact that you're aware of it is a very good thing. By contemplating what you value, and what you want to get out of things, you can better analyze your decisions and act in a way that balances what you want, what you need, what makes you happy, and what contributes to your long term goals.

People have always run in certain circles, developed cliques, and had friends of varying degrees. And by nature, members of the fandom are pretty tight, sometimes to the exclusion of other interests, relationships, goals or activities. I fear that some people get TOO wrapped up in it, and unknowingly cut themselves off from other opportunities to meet people and engage in activities that are not furry-related. I'll get on my soapbox for just a moment and caution people not to define yourself exclusively through furry. Make other friends, have education and career goals, do other things that are good for your fellow man, and take care of yourself. The fandom may, or may not, continue to be important to you in the coming years. Don't use it as an excuse to not relate to other people or cut yourself off from other interests or opportunities. I did that for way too long with other things. *steps down from soapbox*

Inu, your involvement has been worthwhile to me, and I suspect for many many others as well. Are there things more important than "cultivating a persona based around an animal with humanlike qualities"? Yeah, probably. But does that mean that it's time wasted or not worthwhile to you or others? Absolutely not. I would say "don't second guess yourself" about what you wanna do, but I'm a pretty cautious person and think everyone should act rationally and not rush decisions. Being skeptical of one's own actions and motivations can increase your chances of doing the right thing. But, nobody's perfect and we'll all make mistakes no matter how much we overthink things. One can't guarantee perfection, and it's harmful for someone to hold themselves to that standard. You've told me before that doing what makes a person happy is important. We both know there's more to it than that, but you've got a pretty good head on your shoulders, and again, the fact that you're thinking about this is a good thing!