this has been on my mind and I feel that most people do not understand the true intention of the phrase gentleman..(original reference of noble birth aside):
Being a gentleman is the ability to be calm and collected (holding restraint). Most anyone can perform feats of aggression or be forceful a gentleman has the ability of restraint. imagine picking up a butterfly how would you go about it? if you grab it's wings then you will render it incapable of flight if you pluck at the body you may kill it. To be a gentleman one must be the hand calmly enveloping that butterfly. That is not to be confused with Pacifism. Just because a gentleman may not be aggressive it does not mean he is weak.Your connections and life is this butterfly. One of the fastest ways to see a gentleman's ability to perform under restraint would be to crush that butterfly. Although I would not consider that wise because power lays in knowing when to let be and when to fight.