I've never been to a con myself, but I know several people who have. From what they have told me, it's a mixture of both of your polar opposites. By and large, it's a hangout for the fandom, though artists do go and sell stuff and discuss things. I haven't heard any reports of rape, but as with any gathering, there will be some portion of attendees that doesn't get the rules of personal space and etiquette. Like how sci-fi conventions are mostly made up of normal people who have a strong interest in it (or a particular section of it, like Star Trek), but occasionally there will be creepy weirdos who use the con as an excuse to get close to people who share their interests and therefore, in their minds, share ALL their interests/won't judge them for their (inappropriate) behavior.

If you think they're interesting but aren't sure you want to go, you might consider trying to find a 'roommate' kind of thing--I know there are several people who look for room-sharing or the like when they go to cons. Alternatively, if you have a longsuffering friend that wouldn't judge you for being a furry, you could ask to have them come with you for a day trip kind of thing--sort of "taste" the con without a full-bore commitment. Your experience there can then guide your future decisions about them.

Well the actual rape part was kind of an exaggeration, but manly I always kind of saw the furry community as the adult side of it so to say. And so one side of me thinks that its just a convention to go looking at porn, which in turn leads to just weird things... But I've been seeing a lot of other sides to the community lately which has got me really just curious to see if I want to take the next step into this whole furry thing. And yes the roommate thing sounds like the way i would go.

It's like asking what happens at Disneyland. Some people might say you ride Splash Mountain and meet Donald Duck. Other might tell you you hang out at Club 33 all afternoon and trip your tits off at the Mad T Party because your cousin is a cunt.

What?

But at Disneyland its an amusiment park so you know there will be stuff to do and all sorts of people go. Where as the other hand at a furry convention your dealing with manly just the people I presume. So i guess the real question is what is the furry community like in real life?

It all depends on what you're there to do, and who you hang out with. Frankly I haven't seen the most extreme stuff you've mentioned. Most of my time was spent meeting people from around the country (and the world) who I've only known online. Just hanging out with friends, chatting, playing games, nothing that was too crazy. Maybe I haven't been to a big enough one to see the worst behavior though, I've only attended Rainfurrest in Washington and Further Confusion in California. FC is the biggest west coast convention, but I hear Anthrocon is the biggest overall. Most of my time at cons is spent wondering around, sitting in panels, browsing the Dealer's Den, nothing I've seen would make me really wary of attending more of them.

That is exactly the answer i was looking for. Now if i could find a group like ones you seem to go with, It sounds like i would love this type of thing. Its just all this talk about what people "think" goes on there that really deters me from going. Honestly I really want to go just to meet all different kinds of people, with a common ground (furry fandom) which I consider to be my big secret i guess. Another question for you though is what are these panels about?

There's a wide range of panels! Some are about learning to draw, I remember one about fursuit making. At FC there's a few just showing off artwork that was done for the convention. Of course there's adult artwork panels as well. I'm not going to lie and say sex doesn't go on at furry conventions, but I think you really have to seek it out to find that stuff. There's usually one floor of the hotel that's a party floor, and last FC I attended it was covered in plastic everywhere in case of drink spillage. I did hear the same rumors about how furry cons go that you probably did, but the first one I attended was pretty much just like any other convention, mostly just people wondering around everywhere checking out events and meeting new people.

It depends on who you go with I guess.

There will always be those who want to indulge their mindless lust on someone. This type of people gets a lot of unfair attention and aren't true friends.

A majority of the fandom are nice and open. I think its mostly online that the creepy sorts are more prevalent.

Tis an odd fandom.

It seems like an open fandom though. I would like to meet some real life furs and I figured the best way to do that would be one of these conventions. And not to be to big of a hypocrite, I was thinking it would be a bunch of sex crazed creepers most in fursuits, probably because to be honest that's how I came upon this fandom threw the porn aspect. Guess if I want to I just gotta jump in and go for it, and attend one. Just really sucks that none of them come within like 400 miles from me...

you should never judge by stereotypes, cause they're usually wrong

plus the furry fandom gets a lot harshness from sex in the fandom....despite the fact that there's a tonne of sexual stuff in the anime fandom (there's some anime fans in the furry fandom. Some are nice, some are really nasty). And honestly, that's not the main focus of fursuits---the main focus of fursuits is getting into character and having fun and making friends.