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I'll admit...
12 years ago
I have come to eat your soul.
I will admit the holiday season tends to be a depressing time for me. Mostly for a few reasons.
It makes me remember loved ones and friends lost to me that I will never see again.
It also reminds me how alone I am in RL, especially since I still live in the VA controlled shelter.
It reminds me of commitment issues I have when it comes to finding a mate... which I will admit is the first time I admitted to this... and I know the reason is likely due to numerous rejections, 2 mates leaving me and a few other things in my past.
How I never seen my nephews, let along family in several years, minus through facebook... and the internet is not the same as seeing them in person.
How I smile and say things like happy holidays to friends at work, as well as customers... but how I am not sure I believe it myself.
So yea this is likely just a rant in the end but eh this is how I am from november till mid febuary.. as the holidays most celebrated during that time range, involve spending time with family, friends and loved ones.... something i have not done in years.
It makes me remember loved ones and friends lost to me that I will never see again.
It also reminds me how alone I am in RL, especially since I still live in the VA controlled shelter.
It reminds me of commitment issues I have when it comes to finding a mate... which I will admit is the first time I admitted to this... and I know the reason is likely due to numerous rejections, 2 mates leaving me and a few other things in my past.
How I never seen my nephews, let along family in several years, minus through facebook... and the internet is not the same as seeing them in person.
How I smile and say things like happy holidays to friends at work, as well as customers... but how I am not sure I believe it myself.
So yea this is likely just a rant in the end but eh this is how I am from november till mid febuary.. as the holidays most celebrated during that time range, involve spending time with family, friends and loved ones.... something i have not done in years.
I don't blame you for missing the family. Koyia can empathize with you on that. She hasn't seen her's in a few years and she isn't used to that. All I have around me is my mom and one aunt. The rest I can care less about. Long long story.