Dear lord. I'm so sorry you went through so much suffering. :(

It's been a long time my friend. We met each other when you and I was still young to all this and now it seems to be a weight on us like a bag of bricks that comes and goes when it chooses. Suppose it's the road we chose in life? The people we been subjected to over the years maybe things didn't become as originally thought and now we feel we are so far off course from where we was we look like different people in the mirror ? I ask this because I go thru blue moments too and have to ask these things of myself because I often wonder if I shoulda stayed away from all this .

*Gives hug* Depression is nasty thing :/ I know totaly how you feel couse i have been on almost same things, but the end is same. Depression :/ Take one step at the time and take your time when you need it. Hope there is someone who likes to listen and one who you like to talk with :) *Gives tight hug and rubs your back same time*