I think it may have been a mistake to move to South Bend. I'm fighting a battle I cant win, and invested more than I care to admit to make sure I could make it. I compromised my self-worth and my integrity, and to be honest, I'm not happy. Not one bit. I'm on the verge of tears realizing that I'm failing at the one thing that I thought I could do best, be independent at all costs. My stubborn self-reliance has spun me into a vortex of self-hatred and confusion about what to do. My stress and anxiety are climbing every day, and its making my hair get thinner and acne is popping up. I'm not getting enough hours at work to pay rent and utilities, let alone food and other needs, and I have debt racking up that is starting to bury me.

So, to those of you that told me in the beginning that it probably wouldn't work out, you can now say "I told you so." I deserve it.