I'm just tired, I'm tired of being lie to and all these death around me. I don't want this clouding my emotions and judgment but how the hell can I find any happiness at this very moment when all I hear is how a cousin OD'd and a friends went off with himself. My closet friend who I've known for so long lie to me and try to find a scape goat to swerve their way around if lime all of that was a waste of effort on my part. And my father with him acting like life at his place is more pure of ad life style than home. It's like being burned at both ends of the torch. And I'll eventually just fall into a like of ash, not given a single fuck for anything or anyone. Cuase who the hell can stop death and deception itself? Correct answer is no one. I need a fuckin hug right now and a cigarette.