yep so i made it here. Yea im still in one piece i think anyway... though they have this funky green water and i swear i saw a three eyed fish beckoning me into the water.

So yea life has been overly super craptastic. Aside from the sever depression that im suffering from and constantly endless stress from being in a war zone my life has truly become a rotting hell. As i have told the one or two friends that still attempt to hold conversation with me.

It is simply fated for my life to be overly difficult and lonely. I have come to accept that there is no such thing as love and that I will spend it pretty much alone.

EMO sounding oh no doubts about it. However it is proven time and time again with stone cold fact to which i am not inclined to really go into details any time soon. suffice it to say that i get sick of people telling me how great and wonderfully sweet that i am and when it gets mentioned that i am interested in them they suddenly get mated. Then i show im hurt and all they can say is "sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you" How the fuck can you not mean to hurt someone that has set up plans to come out of a war zone visit you and you grab the first person of the street to call a mate. then say that I am a great person and deserve to be happy serioiusly what the fuck.

i digress i have gotten off topic. Its not a Merry Christmas, nor a happy holiday's so while you all sit at home in your nice warm houses i hope that you take a moment to think about the people that aren't at home with their families and remember to take the time to give two damns about them so enjoy your time at home and know there are those who aren't cause they are fighting for you all.