FA+
Shop
I need YOUR opinion!!!
11 years ago
So over my AC weekend (which was fantastic btw!) I got to meet quite an amazing amount of really cool people. I got invited to go out drinking with a group and I started to talk to one of the people there and he was really cool and I was really excited to make a new friend until he repeatedly began to call me pup.
Now I understand that some furs in the fandom do not mean anything negative when you call or get called pup, but personally I find it kind of demeaning. Like it feels like to me that when someone calls me "pup" (especially when I do not know said person very well) that they do not see me on equal standing. That they can look down on me because they think of themselves more dominant. It just sounds disrespectful to me
Let me explain to you that this is a very easy way to get on my bad side. One: if we just met, you have absolutely no clue who I am or what I am capable of. How are you going to be so quick to judge someone and automatically assume that you can just call them pup?
Two: I have noticed that some people who are into the "pet master thing" or "pup play" and are on the "dominant" side of it just assume that it makes them "alpha" over anyone they meet. I don't have anything against you if this is your thing, but even if I did practice it by no way in hell do you have the right to call me pup just because you think you have control over some other submissive human being. You don't know me. You can't handle any of this. Anyways, outside the fetish they are PEOPLE. NOT SEXUAL OBJECTS.
Three: I understand that I may be overreacting. You may even say, "But Kc, he was just being a furry and all furries call each other pups and other weird nicknames." To which I will most likely respond "But that is the problem. Not everybody wants to be associated with a nickname that may or may not have submissive connotations."
To me, especially when I JUST MET YOU, it feels a lot like when someone cat calls a person on the street and say something like "Eh yo bitch, you lookin' damn fine." Like what? Don't you fucking dare push your masculinity on me just because you think you are hot shit and think you have a shot at getting me in bed. I will end you.
Anyways, am I over-reacting?
Now I understand that some furs in the fandom do not mean anything negative when you call or get called pup, but personally I find it kind of demeaning. Like it feels like to me that when someone calls me "pup" (especially when I do not know said person very well) that they do not see me on equal standing. That they can look down on me because they think of themselves more dominant. It just sounds disrespectful to me
Let me explain to you that this is a very easy way to get on my bad side. One: if we just met, you have absolutely no clue who I am or what I am capable of. How are you going to be so quick to judge someone and automatically assume that you can just call them pup?
Two: I have noticed that some people who are into the "pet master thing" or "pup play" and are on the "dominant" side of it just assume that it makes them "alpha" over anyone they meet. I don't have anything against you if this is your thing, but even if I did practice it by no way in hell do you have the right to call me pup just because you think you have control over some other submissive human being. You don't know me. You can't handle any of this. Anyways, outside the fetish they are PEOPLE. NOT SEXUAL OBJECTS.
Three: I understand that I may be overreacting. You may even say, "But Kc, he was just being a furry and all furries call each other pups and other weird nicknames." To which I will most likely respond "But that is the problem. Not everybody wants to be associated with a nickname that may or may not have submissive connotations."
To me, especially when I JUST MET YOU, it feels a lot like when someone cat calls a person on the street and say something like "Eh yo bitch, you lookin' damn fine." Like what? Don't you fucking dare push your masculinity on me just because you think you are hot shit and think you have a shot at getting me in bed. I will end you.
Anyways, am I over-reacting?
not to mention 'pup' is a word that means a lot within the pupplay community. It's a title of endearment that is earned. -n- so to have it thrown around so easily is kinda... against the point.
A simple "I don't think it's appropriate or respectful to use that word for someone you just met." could go a long way to improving things. It gives them a chance to change how they talk to just you, and also may cause them to question their approach.
Heck, I AM a sub, and I still don't wanna be called pup until a guy has flirted with me and I've shown interest in return. So I empathize with you.
i've had the same happen to me, and i can't say i appreciate it in any way when someone who've i just met goes there.
i actually like the term when someone i know/like uses it, but i hate assumptions.