Making things right
11 years ago
|| & ||
Apologies for the personal journal but I figured it was coming time for this.
Things are coming to a head here, in a good way. I've been picked up by an agent, I'm going to be moving in a couple months into my own place, I am getting my finances worked out, and, for the first time in 10 years, I've been able to function without depression.
I really want this new chapter in my life to start right and, as such, I need to get through everything owed.
I can't begin to be grateful for everybody's patience. I can't begin to thank those that have supported me, and sat up through the long nights of crying and self-doubt.
To the people I owe commissions and trades, I still have all intentions of completing the work I owe. Though it is no excuse, I have gotten to a point where I can focus on work as work, I can separate my private and business lives. For a long time, I would let dealing with my family overrun everything else. I would exhaust myself trying to emotionally support my mother and nana and not leave anything for myself. In this, I neglected my work and my commissioners and simply sailed through in hopes of people not noticing how much time had passed.
And every time I would log onto FA, it would be with dread, thinking that today was the day I would get the notes pouring in.
Why this never happened, I don't know. And for everybody out there waiting patiently, expecting updates, or to see *something* in the way of work, I thank you. For your patience, your understanding, your support I thank you.
I've been in therapy for a year now and I have gotten much stronger.
Please bear a bit more waiting as I work.
I cannot continue living my life in excuses and expecting people to get dragged along with me.
For the first time in a very long time, I can say I am excited for the future. I am happy and I am content in my life.
I am eager to get paintings finished. And I am looking forward to making my clients happy.
And I thank you, all of you, for the kindness you have offered me.
You all rock. ;w;
/back to the work desk.
Things are coming to a head here, in a good way. I've been picked up by an agent, I'm going to be moving in a couple months into my own place, I am getting my finances worked out, and, for the first time in 10 years, I've been able to function without depression.
I really want this new chapter in my life to start right and, as such, I need to get through everything owed.
I can't begin to be grateful for everybody's patience. I can't begin to thank those that have supported me, and sat up through the long nights of crying and self-doubt.
To the people I owe commissions and trades, I still have all intentions of completing the work I owe. Though it is no excuse, I have gotten to a point where I can focus on work as work, I can separate my private and business lives. For a long time, I would let dealing with my family overrun everything else. I would exhaust myself trying to emotionally support my mother and nana and not leave anything for myself. In this, I neglected my work and my commissioners and simply sailed through in hopes of people not noticing how much time had passed.
And every time I would log onto FA, it would be with dread, thinking that today was the day I would get the notes pouring in.
Why this never happened, I don't know. And for everybody out there waiting patiently, expecting updates, or to see *something* in the way of work, I thank you. For your patience, your understanding, your support I thank you.
I've been in therapy for a year now and I have gotten much stronger.
Please bear a bit more waiting as I work.
I cannot continue living my life in excuses and expecting people to get dragged along with me.
For the first time in a very long time, I can say I am excited for the future. I am happy and I am content in my life.
I am eager to get paintings finished. And I am looking forward to making my clients happy.
And I thank you, all of you, for the kindness you have offered me.
You all rock. ;w;
/back to the work desk.
FA+

;w; And you've helped me <3
I am sorry to hear that D:
It was..forgiven.... ANd there is next time... I'm already stashing away funds. Mate says no. Friends say yes.
*hugs*
Working through your queue will take a lot of stress off of you, I think. One step at a time is still moving forward, after all. And a lot of people on this site are thankfully fine with waiting!
You're doing great!
But I did. ;w;
I'm excited about the things coming. And I'm really anxious to get my work finished. That will definitely make me feel a LOT better.
<3 Thank you, hun~ ;A; That means so much to me.
You know what you've been through, and it's just made you stronger for having survived it. Now it's time to thrive. You're in a better head space now - use that to your best advantage, and don't let yourself become even a bit overwhelmed. As always it's one task at a time, with your goals kept in focus.
You know we're all here to support you, and it really is thrilling to see you doing well and looking forward!
Zhai'helleva, Kitsunia!
<3 Thank you, hun~ That means so much to me. ;;
That's awesome news!
I think your work is definitely worth waiting for. I still really love the commission I got from you a couple of years ago :D
Best of luck, and I look forward to seeing what new art you produce.
I am glad! <3
Andholypoop has it seriously been two years?? omfg I am SO sorry!! ;A; Ohfuck I need to get on that asap,
Nooo, I still love what you did!! ;A;
;; But at least the art will be better? Augh I have nothing to say for putting it off so long ;.;
Hfff, I dooo <3<3
And it does feel very good to actually look at the positives in my life.
Yes definitely~ Please keep your eyes toward the light
<3 I will when I get something for you! :)
Thank you! :)
It feels sooooo good! <3
And yeh, that really truly means a lot to me, thank you~ I hope things are going well for you, too. :)
Still drawing men doing gay man things, lol
But I also draw boobies now. 8D
How are things going on your end of the states?
Hahah, well that's good!
I'm currently doing... whatever the furry side of the internet tells me to do that isn't porn, lol.
DNA's coming along though, idk if you remember that dumb thing. First volume's written, second volume's about halfway there, I started a Patreon for it so that I can start actually drawing it soon. I'm excited.
Bleh, it sucks over here, hah. LA's dirty and rude and I have no friends anymore because they all turned out to be fair-weather assholes so it's like, I don't have a reason to be living here at this point. I wanna move back to Indiana, I miss having weather. Other than that, things have been pretty good though! I'm doing a comic book for someone's company right now. It's my first real industry work so I'm totally stoked about that. :D
Congrats on the comic job!! I am so glad to hear you're getting work. ;;
And yeh, I totally understand about LA. Went there once, never again lol
Hopefully you can move. Indiana has not really changed, hfff Corn. Corn everywhere.
Sorry to hear about the friend situation :/ that is shitty. But I am glad things are otherwise going well ~ You really deserve a good life~
How's Requiem coming along? :D
Heeeeh thanks! I'm a little nervous because it's a really new company, but other than that minor thing everything looks super promising. I hope I end up getting more work from it, that'd be fantastic.
Lol yeah you told me about your visit here when we were on the phone, you got your wallet ganked, right? I don't even keep my wallet in my pocket I'm so scared of that, I carry a backpack everywhere because that's more difficult to steal from. x.x
To be honest, I miss the corn. xD There's no forests here or anything it's all just filth and concrete. This city's got a roach problem like you wouldn't believe, I hate it. Chicago had nothing like this.
It is shitty, but being alone isn't anything I'm not already used to. I'll manage, heh.
Aaaagh I'm really glad things are starting to go well for you now though!! You deserve that, you've been dealing with bullshit since I met you.
It's going really well. It actually has a plot now lol
I ended up kicking them off of Earth and putting them into their own place, so I've been busy doing environmental studies, mapmaking... Totally a dork lol. Working on their language right now~ it's actually really nice to get out of the... I don't know... Stupid phase? Lol no more whiny characters and shit actually makes sense XD
I have a publisher whose already interested in it. I just need to stop being lazy, lol
Ugh I hate big cities for that reason. No green unless it's artificial, hff. Aaaand that's totally another reason to avoid LA. Fantastic. Does LA do like roach races or something?? XD
Fff thanks ;; Mutual excitement ftw!!
I've actually been working on the same sort of thing, hahah. I don't have the island mapped out yet (moved it from the mainland to some island in the middle of nowhere that's not on any maps because government trying to hide secrets blah blah) and it'd be geographically similar to like... Well, New York, Maine, those places, it's in that direction. I need to research the kinds of trees and plants and topography and stuff, but right now I'm still stuck on character designs. Not everyone's designed yet ;.; I still have one whiny character, but there's actually a point to that instead of just mindless misery, lol.
AND THAT'S SO GOOD!! I'm not going to bother with publishers for my thing, just gonna self-publish right on the internet and hope for the best.
HEEEEH YEAH no like I thought it was going to be like it was in Chicago, and it's very not there's just vermin everywhere. I saw a total of 1 rat when I was out there, but out here there's rats and roaches everywhere. I'm just glad the roaches stay outside for the most part. x.x They may as well have roach racing, the whole city is a roach race, even during the day I can see them sometimes.
Ahhh that is seriously the best stuff to research. Hfff am super excited for DNA, like an obscene amount of excite, lol. ;3; please, please, please keep me updated~ I really think when it hits the Internet it's going to take off. >w<
8D well, that sounds like a big bunch of nope! I do hope you move when you get the opportunity because that really does not sound like a good environment. :/
HURRAY FOR NO MORE MINDLESS MISERY :D :D :D
And I will! Keep me updated on Requiem, I fuckin loved those characters and I'm super glad you stuck with it and you're doing stuff and yoU'VE GOT A PUBLISHER INTERESTED and that is so awesome
I'm tempted to be all LET'S GEEK OUT OVER OUR CHARACTERS AND HOW THEY'VE CHANGED IN THE PAST COUPLE YEARS but I don't know if you'd really be up for that pff
I sure hope DNA takes off, I'm nervous about it. Like everyone who's read it have told me it's really good and they get visibly excited/attached to characters, but they were also friends and the person I'm dating so until I actually have story out in the open I'm taking that with a grain of salt lol.
Oh yeah I'm moving at the first chance I get. x.x Probably not to Indiana, but to somewhere. Boyfriend's in the military, I'm probably gonna go to whatever base they shove him at when I can, heh.
WE TOTALLY SHOULD!! D: I want to knoooow and have so much to teeeell /rolls
I can understand that~ But I know too you do great work. :)
What branch is he serving? D: Hope he is doing alright!
He's in the airforce! He's actually here with me right now, though it's just temporary. I think they're officially assigning him a base at the end of the month, neither of us are totally sure.
Ahhhh that's awesome! Hi person!
Hope he gets placed well!
Hahah, so do I, he was saying he was thinking he's gonna be shoved in Missouri and I was all D: no pls
I'm hoping for Washington, lol.
Washington would be nice! >w<