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I hate moodswings. Depression hitting in.
11 years ago
General
Warning: Possible cursing ahead.
Scroll down for TL;DR.
As the title says, I feel like my depression's hitting in again.
I know the cause, just not how to handle it. And I hate it.
There's a lot on my mind right now, has been increasingly for a few months now (at least). Relationship stuff,
getting a job ASAP, thus money issues, art and commissioners... It might not sound like much but it's tearing
me apart.
Hell, even keeping the house clean (which I normally enjoy rather much) or rebooting my laptop when my
tablet's pressure sensitivity is off feels like the biggest burden and hardest thing to do. I have absolutely no
motivation at all, for anything.
Even when my beloved has asked me a few times in the last few days if I'm okay I've just told him that "Yeah,
no problem" because I know what I would say would just annoy him. As always (but that's just how he is).
As for how this touches any of you and my art...
I've put a lot of thought into it for the past couple of days, and... I'm seriously thinking of dropping all or
most of the commissions I have and refunding everyone.
Though that will have to wait until I get money from somewhere, by either getting another job or even social
care (or what the hell ever one calls it again)... Or something. I'll figure it out, I have a couple of appointments
which I hope to help me with at least money troubles... And maybe, just maybe, when I get the money trouble
out of my way the relationship stuff will clear itself off as well and then I can get my mood back to draw/art...
And since I'm always capable of seeing something positive in every situation... At least I can confidently say
that I'm one of those people who recognize when it's really hitting in and know to react to it.
Not much to find pleasure in, but hey, it's something. I suppose...
Anywho. I'm taking a few days to myself... Again.
I'm sorry for being such a shitty person atm to have given your money to, not to mention deadlines and
dealing with.
TL;DR: My depression is hitting in, I can't do really anything at the moment. I'm thinking of dropping all my
commissions and refunding the commissioners. Relationship trouble, should get a job ASAP, thanks to all that
I can't bring myself to draw anything after the bunny I sketched.
Scroll down for TL;DR.
As the title says, I feel like my depression's hitting in again.
I know the cause, just not how to handle it. And I hate it.
There's a lot on my mind right now, has been increasingly for a few months now (at least). Relationship stuff,
getting a job ASAP, thus money issues, art and commissioners... It might not sound like much but it's tearing
me apart.
Hell, even keeping the house clean (which I normally enjoy rather much) or rebooting my laptop when my
tablet's pressure sensitivity is off feels like the biggest burden and hardest thing to do. I have absolutely no
motivation at all, for anything.
Even when my beloved has asked me a few times in the last few days if I'm okay I've just told him that "Yeah,
no problem" because I know what I would say would just annoy him. As always (but that's just how he is).
As for how this touches any of you and my art...
I've put a lot of thought into it for the past couple of days, and... I'm seriously thinking of dropping all or
most of the commissions I have and refunding everyone.
Though that will have to wait until I get money from somewhere, by either getting another job or even social
care (or what the hell ever one calls it again)... Or something. I'll figure it out, I have a couple of appointments
which I hope to help me with at least money troubles... And maybe, just maybe, when I get the money trouble
out of my way the relationship stuff will clear itself off as well and then I can get my mood back to draw/art...
And since I'm always capable of seeing something positive in every situation... At least I can confidently say
that I'm one of those people who recognize when it's really hitting in and know to react to it.
Not much to find pleasure in, but hey, it's something. I suppose...
Anywho. I'm taking a few days to myself... Again.
I'm sorry for being such a shitty person atm to have given your money to, not to mention deadlines and
dealing with.
TL;DR: My depression is hitting in, I can't do really anything at the moment. I'm thinking of dropping all my
commissions and refunding the commissioners. Relationship trouble, should get a job ASAP, thanks to all that
I can't bring myself to draw anything after the bunny I sketched.
But, we'll see. If I end up deciding I don' wanna do 'em I'll be sure to return the money anyway~ It would be utterly rude to just keep it, unless I had some serious things I needed money for. :I
Besides, you've always been nice so I would feel bad u.u