So I was tasked with having to come up with earning about $300 in about a week for the electric bill. My dad is a freaking polar bear and AC isn't cheap here. On top of that we are renting this house and are required to pay for a specific pool service. We kept shutting off the water filter to save electricity and they tightened the switch or something so we can't continue to turn it off. We clean the pool daily anyway so it's not like it causes more work for them anyway. Our electric bill is over $500 each month and we just can't afford that.
My brother also just finished his last week at the NCC (its temporary work) so he is moving back in with us but he doesn't have a job anymore. Pretty sure he is helping us out with the money I was supposed to come up with but I still have to pay him back for that anyway. So it doesn't really change anything. But Bubba will be looking for work and so will Zach when he gets back. If everyone had a job things would be great. I think I need to be looking for work too and doing art commissions on the side.
So yeah.... I have to clear out the craft room now so my brother has a room. I have nowhere to put Lightning now (my rat who lives alone because he is aggresive) and I just don't know what to do.
My dad is being an asshole and acts like the only reason I want to see a therapist is so I can get hormone treatment which is bs. I was talking about getting therapy for my anxiety and depression way before I even came out as trans. He is pretty damn confident that they are going to tell me I'm going through a phase and that I'm going to act like the world is ending when they do tell me that. I'm turning 22 at the end of this month I came out for the first time OVER a year ago. If it were a phase wouldn't it be over now? I mean fuck I've been wishing I were male since elementary school. What more do you want from me?
And he was so pissed when Willow was over and was calling me male pronouns. IT MAKES ME HAPPY, SHOULDN'T THAT MEAN ANYTHING TO YOU?
And I haven't even been shoving this down their throats or anything. In fact I avoid talking about it completely around my dad. Cause he makes rude remarks when I do. I bring it up around my mom a lot to try and get her used to the idea but otherwise I try not to bother her. At least I'm being understanding about how this affects them and how hard it is to get used to it.
I don't know what to do. I can't remember to even call the damn therapist.