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Family Stresses *Mini Rant*
11 years ago
General
Ugg... it seems no matter what people always get mad at me. I just cant do right.
that despite working as hard as I can during the summar making money the way I wanted. my grands and tuition covereing like 95% of my cost of school. and finding free healthcare so I only had to pay 400 dollars out of pocket for classes... which I was able to pay for...
Im still being criticized by my grandma, being told horrible things that Im not making enough and i didnt try hard enough to get a oppressive minimum wage job. that what I have achived is not good enough and that i need to pay my own way.
that asking if she might want to aide in paying for a bus pass that would make it so im Essentially 100% self reliant, when in the past shes has told me she would be happy to help me with school supply's.then just attacks me on a personal lvl about not trying hard enough to get store jobs instead of commissions.
its really frustrating to me i suppose.. I try my best to treat her like a person to be a good grand child to her, that she compliments me, tells me all these nice things to my face how she is proud of me and is excited for what Im doing, but then in a split second just turns into a monster.. and just tears my soul apart and make me feel like everything Ive done is shit.
that the fact im in a respectable 4 year art college, using every resource i can to be successful. that at the moment em more successful than most people of my family.being thrifty with every dollar i own. that my hard work to get here earning scholarships that pay all but 400 of 19,000 dollars tuition...and that working as hard as I have.. the fact i dont have left over money to buy a bus pass is offensive to her. that who I am is wrong.
that the way I see the world is wrong. that my ideas of trying to make money are incorrect.
*sighs*.... just makes me want to curl up and never speak again.
that despite working as hard as I can during the summar making money the way I wanted. my grands and tuition covereing like 95% of my cost of school. and finding free healthcare so I only had to pay 400 dollars out of pocket for classes... which I was able to pay for...
Im still being criticized by my grandma, being told horrible things that Im not making enough and i didnt try hard enough to get a oppressive minimum wage job. that what I have achived is not good enough and that i need to pay my own way.
that asking if she might want to aide in paying for a bus pass that would make it so im Essentially 100% self reliant, when in the past shes has told me she would be happy to help me with school supply's.then just attacks me on a personal lvl about not trying hard enough to get store jobs instead of commissions.
its really frustrating to me i suppose.. I try my best to treat her like a person to be a good grand child to her, that she compliments me, tells me all these nice things to my face how she is proud of me and is excited for what Im doing, but then in a split second just turns into a monster.. and just tears my soul apart and make me feel like everything Ive done is shit.
that the fact im in a respectable 4 year art college, using every resource i can to be successful. that at the moment em more successful than most people of my family.being thrifty with every dollar i own. that my hard work to get here earning scholarships that pay all but 400 of 19,000 dollars tuition...and that working as hard as I have.. the fact i dont have left over money to buy a bus pass is offensive to her. that who I am is wrong.
that the way I see the world is wrong. that my ideas of trying to make money are incorrect.
*sighs*.... just makes me want to curl up and never speak again.
I hope she sees the light and helps you reach your goals though, family should be there for you.