By the gods I need some blasted anti depressants. Not the cheap wimpy stuff either I need the heavy duty stuff, I need to be numb. Well maybe not numb I just need something to help me regain focus. Life is so f*cked up right now, I almost killed Christmas for my father. The one family member that actually means anything to me and I almost killed the one holiday he cares about. He picks up on my moods and they help to shape his mood.

Unfortunately I am something of an extreme downer, people walk into a room and get depressed. I'm like E... oh by the gods how do you spell his name. The mopey blue mule on Winnie the Pooh. I'm like him only on steroids. If I could focus it into a beam and shoot it at people I would be like a super hero. The Depresser! He makes villians so depressed they arrest themselves, and sometimes execute themselves!

Yeah I'm crazy. But I'm also going to be taking a little break from the net. I am just going to be ummm poking around once in a while but not going to be too active.