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Real Talk
11 years ago
First of all, I want to apologize to anyone waiting on commissions from me. I'm still not taking any new commissions, and may not be for a long time. My new job has kept me busy, but it hasn't kept me that busy. My turn-around time when it comes to commissions has always been lousy, and I have no excuses.
This job was a major relief to me when I was hired. Before then, I was lethargic and could barely find the motivation to draw things for myself, much less the five to ten people who had paid me to draw for them. I guess what I was lacking was a solid schedule and someone to keep an eye on me.
The way things were going, I just did not see any future for myself as a professional artist. To be honest, as time went on and more talented people started drawing the same kind of things I was, I was becoming more and more paranoid that I'd fall behind and that people would forget about it. It can be difficult to compete with other artists for commissions, but more talented, motivated, and charismatic abdl/gts/whatever artists seemed to be coming out of the wood-works.
I'd self-identified myself as a professional artist, and my failure to achieve any kind if financial independence and my family's lack of respect for me was bumming me out. It's even more depressing when I think about how little I can actually tell them without being humiliated. There's a lot of pressure, both from my fans and from myself, to always improve, and it can be a bit overwhelming at times. I think I was more productive when I was younger and had no concept of how difficult drawing was.
I feel that things are going to turn out ok for me now, though. After I finish my backlog of commissions, I can start drawing exclusively as a hobby again. I may return to the professional art scene in the future. If I do, I'd like to do more personal projects, like comics and such, that I can enjoy making on a more personal level and still make a profit off of. I've considered trying to get a degree in art. I'd like to rekindle whatever it was that inspired me to start drawing in the first place.
Things may be slow right now, but don't worry. I'm not going anywhere.
This job was a major relief to me when I was hired. Before then, I was lethargic and could barely find the motivation to draw things for myself, much less the five to ten people who had paid me to draw for them. I guess what I was lacking was a solid schedule and someone to keep an eye on me.
The way things were going, I just did not see any future for myself as a professional artist. To be honest, as time went on and more talented people started drawing the same kind of things I was, I was becoming more and more paranoid that I'd fall behind and that people would forget about it. It can be difficult to compete with other artists for commissions, but more talented, motivated, and charismatic abdl/gts/whatever artists seemed to be coming out of the wood-works.
I'd self-identified myself as a professional artist, and my failure to achieve any kind if financial independence and my family's lack of respect for me was bumming me out. It's even more depressing when I think about how little I can actually tell them without being humiliated. There's a lot of pressure, both from my fans and from myself, to always improve, and it can be a bit overwhelming at times. I think I was more productive when I was younger and had no concept of how difficult drawing was.
I feel that things are going to turn out ok for me now, though. After I finish my backlog of commissions, I can start drawing exclusively as a hobby again. I may return to the professional art scene in the future. If I do, I'd like to do more personal projects, like comics and such, that I can enjoy making on a more personal level and still make a profit off of. I've considered trying to get a degree in art. I'd like to rekindle whatever it was that inspired me to start drawing in the first place.
Things may be slow right now, but don't worry. I'm not going anywhere.
toddlergirl
~toddlergirl
*hugs* everyone has their own personal journey they've got to explore, we're rooting for you.
NormalDeviant
~normaldeviant
OP
Thank you!
HydroFTT
~hydroftt
I can relate to sooo much of this, especially how hard it is not being able to tell pretty much anyone about what it is that I draw (much less be able to show off any of it). Although I've had less luck finding other work, partly due to medical problems, so my hobby-level of money making is still my main income.
NormalDeviant
~normaldeviant
OP
This job was a lucky break for me. I don't think I'd have gotten it if a family member hadn't put in a good word for me.
HydroFTT
~hydroftt
Yeah that's just how it is right now. Unfortunately I don't have family who I'd want to work with though haha...
NormalDeviant
~normaldeviant
OP
They don't work there, they just happened to be talking to one of the managers.
HydroFTT
~hydroftt
Oh, then indeed that was lucky! Most people I know that have gotten jobs recently it's basically either working for a family member or working somewhere with large employee turnover (grocery stores for example).
