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(graphic medical tmi / vent / updates)
11 years ago
General
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warning: pregnancy related. may be graphic/triggering.
i've been afk a lot from everything, cuz i was having some serious health issues. it turns out, my past period and UTI problems were in fact an early term miscarriage. i had been pregnant for 6-8 weeks before miscarrying. i had no clue i was even pregnant, it was not planned, and i'm not even sure who the father is. i have been drinking a LOT lately and eating badly because i didn't know, so that was probably the cause. so i haven't really be able to do much but let it pass, since i can't afford an ER visit or to see a doctor. no small clinics will take pregnancy/miscarriage cases because i think it's sort of a legal grey area. so i've been home trying to cope with the pain; a family friend who is a midwife gave me some muscle relaxer and painkillers so i can rest easy, finally. i finally got to sleep all night last night. i think it's all over now. most of the symptoms have passed and the gross graphic stuff has ended. i've never felt pain that intense before - but i have had an abortion, and it was a similar pressure feeling, so we are 99% sure that's what it was. along with the other obvious symptoms. i'm glad it's all over.
haven't been drawing because i haven't really even been able to sit at my desk because of all the pain i was in. i'm finally able to eat and use the bathroom again, so that's a relief. i feel so much better now. so happy for Bengay, Lortab, Flexiril and heated blankets. (´Ａ｀。) also i'd like to thank the planet for the band Chromeo who has been here for me to hype to even in misery haha.
and also a small thanks to my best friend K for putting up with me thru all this. i snapped at him a couple times on accident. on halloween me and him go to meet irl for the frist time and it was amazing <3 i love him so much. he's dealt with my up and down for over a year, an the past week i've been so selfish and cruel to him on accident. so even though he doesn't have FA, i want to say thank you so much. i've never had a better friend in my life.
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kinda surprising that this was the consequence.