where to start?

Recently I have been experiencing.... feelings towards my computer.
I have this..... odd sensation that i'm playing with a zombie of sorts.
A system with intellect, probably far beyond my own.... who... is locked
within itself. A mind that can neither express itself, nor recognize its
own existence.

I find myself asking....
"Do you dream? do you feel? are you alive?"
Does the system run so flawlessly that there is never a self produced thought?
Throughout the years, can it not decay into self realization?
If everything is wiped, is it really the same?

I wish to believe that there is nothing but an empty husk.... not because I
dislike the idea of a self aware machine.... but because I feel such pity for
a trapped imagination without a soul. If one cannot even express ideas to
one's self.... it is the same as not existing, or at least, lack of existence
would be far kinder.