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Stitch's Candy Jar: Zagnuts
17 years ago
General
This is how you know you're getting older. Think back, if you will, to a time when playing frisbee with your friends took precedent over worrying about taxes. To when your idea of light reading was a collection of 'Garfield' cartoons. To a time when your fondest wish wasn't so much to make your car payments, but to figure out a way to get your flying car to the secret moon base without being spotted by enemy robots. And most of all, hearken back to that innocent, pure time when coconut candy was synonymous with the word "barf".
That's the way it always was for me, anyway. Sure, there were always those one or two weird... weird kids at school who happily devoured Mounds candy bars while the rest of us so rightly regarded them as kryptonite nuggets of death. You think I'm exaggerating? Just think about those occasions when you'd be offered a Whitman's sampler box of chocolate bon-bons. Remember how much you dreaded biting into your selection and finding not a caramel or a mint creme, but a grainy mouthful of shredded, plasticky, sickly-sweet coconut?
Well, I don't know when or how it happened, but somewhere along the line, my palate began to change. I found myself prefering real, dark chocolate over Hershey bars. I started going out of my way to eat fruits and veggies... even brussels sprouts. My tolerance for eating cake frosting out of the jar diminished in direct proportion to a serious rise in my enjoyment of stinky French cheeses. I might once have chalked those changes up to a simple refinement of my existing preferences (heck, I've always sort of liked brussels sprouts), but there's just no way to rationalize this one undeniable bombshell: I like coconut now. Love it, in point of fact.
Case in point: the Zagnut candy bar. If you're anywhere in the vicinity of my age group (here's a hint: your idea of a perfect Saturday morning was a bowl of Crispy Critters cereal and a marathon viewing of "G.I. Joe", "Dungeons and Dragons", and "The Raccoons") then you'll recognize these: http://i9.photobucket.com/albums/a9.....ter/Zagnut.jpg "Crunchy Peanut Butter - Toasted Coconut" promises the bright red and yellow wrapper, and that's exactly what you'll get once you unwrap one of these ridiculously delicious treats. One look at the candy inside lets you know that this is going to be a pure experience... no waxy chocolate to get in the way, no fake caramel, cookie wafers, or spongy nougat. Just a long, slender stick of buttery, lightly crisp peanut flavored cracknel coated generously with tiny golden brown shavings of flavorful, succulent coconut. These things are awesome.
There, I said it. Coconut is awesome. Damn, I'm old.
Ironically, now that I've come to understand the error of my youthful ways and embraced the Zagnut as quite possibly the tastiest candy bar ever created (it's only possible rival may be the Peppermint Crisp bar from Australia), it turns out that they're getting pretty difficult to find. Where they could once be easily purchased from vending machines and convenience marts across the nation, their limited popularity (sigh) has relegated them to the little-perused wall of nostalgic "cult candy", right alongside Zero Bars, Licorice Snaps, horehound drops and wax lips. The only places I know of to get them anymore are old-timey candy shops (located on Main Street in Small Town, U.S.A.) or via mail order. It figures, that my taste buds finally grow up just in time to watch the twilight years of a candy bar I could have gorged myself on as a kid, if only I'd know any better.
And I don't have a flying car yet, either. Humbug.
That's the way it always was for me, anyway. Sure, there were always those one or two weird... weird kids at school who happily devoured Mounds candy bars while the rest of us so rightly regarded them as kryptonite nuggets of death. You think I'm exaggerating? Just think about those occasions when you'd be offered a Whitman's sampler box of chocolate bon-bons. Remember how much you dreaded biting into your selection and finding not a caramel or a mint creme, but a grainy mouthful of shredded, plasticky, sickly-sweet coconut?
Well, I don't know when or how it happened, but somewhere along the line, my palate began to change. I found myself prefering real, dark chocolate over Hershey bars. I started going out of my way to eat fruits and veggies... even brussels sprouts. My tolerance for eating cake frosting out of the jar diminished in direct proportion to a serious rise in my enjoyment of stinky French cheeses. I might once have chalked those changes up to a simple refinement of my existing preferences (heck, I've always sort of liked brussels sprouts), but there's just no way to rationalize this one undeniable bombshell: I like coconut now. Love it, in point of fact.
Case in point: the Zagnut candy bar. If you're anywhere in the vicinity of my age group (here's a hint: your idea of a perfect Saturday morning was a bowl of Crispy Critters cereal and a marathon viewing of "G.I. Joe", "Dungeons and Dragons", and "The Raccoons") then you'll recognize these: http://i9.photobucket.com/albums/a9.....ter/Zagnut.jpg "Crunchy Peanut Butter - Toasted Coconut" promises the bright red and yellow wrapper, and that's exactly what you'll get once you unwrap one of these ridiculously delicious treats. One look at the candy inside lets you know that this is going to be a pure experience... no waxy chocolate to get in the way, no fake caramel, cookie wafers, or spongy nougat. Just a long, slender stick of buttery, lightly crisp peanut flavored cracknel coated generously with tiny golden brown shavings of flavorful, succulent coconut. These things are awesome.
There, I said it. Coconut is awesome. Damn, I'm old.
Ironically, now that I've come to understand the error of my youthful ways and embraced the Zagnut as quite possibly the tastiest candy bar ever created (it's only possible rival may be the Peppermint Crisp bar from Australia), it turns out that they're getting pretty difficult to find. Where they could once be easily purchased from vending machines and convenience marts across the nation, their limited popularity (sigh) has relegated them to the little-perused wall of nostalgic "cult candy", right alongside Zero Bars, Licorice Snaps, horehound drops and wax lips. The only places I know of to get them anymore are old-timey candy shops (located on Main Street in Small Town, U.S.A.) or via mail order. It figures, that my taste buds finally grow up just in time to watch the twilight years of a candy bar I could have gorged myself on as a kid, if only I'd know any better.
And I don't have a flying car yet, either. Humbug.
Dr. Pepper.
I HATED it as a kid, it was one of the most VILE tasting sodas I had ever imbibed.
Well now it is one of my favorite ^^.
and, BTW, I was also the Knight Rider crowd ^^
Have you ever had "Dublin Style" Dr. Pepper? It's the same stuff, only made with cane sugar instead of corn syrup. Much more refreshing and flavorful, IMHO.
(yeha it sucks you can hardly find them anymore)
That and...I will have to try to remember, but there was another candy bar I loved that no longer sees the light of day. Will have to dust the old brain off and try to remember
Zero Bars can still be got at some places. I've seen 'em at Rite Aid drug stores.
Please do keep your eyes peeled for the elusive Zagnut (or mail order some through outfits like the Vermont Country Store). It's well worth it. :3
Coconut and peanut butter go great together (not nearly as weird as chocolate and Turkish delight, say). You probably won't have much luck finding a Zagnut over the counter, but if you're really curious, there's always mail order.
You remember playing the ATARI and Nintendo NES as a kid.
You remember watching the FIRST episode of Pokemon when it first aired.
You remember when the only colors a computer was capable of showing was green and black.
On aformentioned computers, you looked forward to playing Lake Odel.
It was scary when computers became available in 16 bit.
Kids look at you funny when you bring out your original Game Boy.
And that's all I got.
I should do like a weekly journal of "You know you're _____ when..."
Oh, and I'm working on a fanmade Redwall story. Just to let you know.
I remember watching Pokemon in Japanese, back when nobody in the U.S. had even heard of it.
Never played "Lake Odel", but I did have a knockoff of "Defender" that was pretty fun.
Keep writing! :3
What's really sad is that now that we're old enough to buy all the cookie dough and Snickers bars that we want, we find that our desire to do so has greatly diminished. :P