Sorta a vent journal cause I just have so much pain inside.
10 years ago
I don't normally write these kind of journals much cause I'm a very private person when it comes to my feelings on things. However, I just need to let off some steam so I am writtng this to help myself.
I guess I'll start by quoting The Godfather. "Bonasera, Bonasera. What have I ever done to make you treat me so disrespectfully?"
I quote this cause its the same question I have mostly. What have I ever done to make people treat me so disrespectfully? Sure, I know many that do treat me with the respect I deserve and I am very grateful for that. But what bothers me is that it seems that some for no given reason at all just either up and remove me, or stop talking to me, saying shit about me behind my back to other mutual friends. I just can't help but wonder. Why? I mean, I would understand it if I had done something that would warrant such actions. If I treated them in a similar manner but I didn't.
I know, many will say I should just let it go and not care anymore. But its hard to do that when you felt very close to someone and they just up and let you go for no reason. If I didn't care about them so much then it wouldn't hurt at all. Kinda makes me wish I didn't care. I mean, to me its like how can someone be so cold and emotionless to just crush a friendship without so much as a word?
Maybe someday I can forgive them enough so I can move on and feel at peace. But for now, I just don't know how I can.
On a final note, boggles my mind how some people can be total jerks to strangers whom are trying to be nice to em but whatever that is their loss then.
I guess I'll start by quoting The Godfather. "Bonasera, Bonasera. What have I ever done to make you treat me so disrespectfully?"
I quote this cause its the same question I have mostly. What have I ever done to make people treat me so disrespectfully? Sure, I know many that do treat me with the respect I deserve and I am very grateful for that. But what bothers me is that it seems that some for no given reason at all just either up and remove me, or stop talking to me, saying shit about me behind my back to other mutual friends. I just can't help but wonder. Why? I mean, I would understand it if I had done something that would warrant such actions. If I treated them in a similar manner but I didn't.
I know, many will say I should just let it go and not care anymore. But its hard to do that when you felt very close to someone and they just up and let you go for no reason. If I didn't care about them so much then it wouldn't hurt at all. Kinda makes me wish I didn't care. I mean, to me its like how can someone be so cold and emotionless to just crush a friendship without so much as a word?
Maybe someday I can forgive them enough so I can move on and feel at peace. But for now, I just don't know how I can.
On a final note, boggles my mind how some people can be total jerks to strangers whom are trying to be nice to em but whatever that is their loss then.
To be given no consideration or respect even when you've given them the utmost respect and offered a olive branch to talk things out even when not knowing what I even did.
You needs hugs!