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Hippo Vehicles
16 years ago
Yoinked from 
tolstoy
1) 1969 Volkswagon Beetle
•Nickname: "The Bug"
•Colour: Tan
•Transmission/Engine: V4, Automatic stickshift. Yes. An automatic stickshift. Had a stick, but no pedal to push. When you touched the knob of the stickshift the engine went into neutral.
•Story: This was my dad's car that he drove to work. When I was little my oldest brother would tell me "Neat Stories" while we drove around - basically he just made up shit. I loved it! The coolest thing about this vehicles was the "Check Check Brakes Light". In the middle of the dashboard was a red button/light with a "B" on it. When you pushed it, it lit up red. Apparently if it ever lit up on its own, your brakes had failed. Therefore you could push it to make sure that the red light hadn't burned out and that your brakes had already failed but you didn't know it. (Sometimes Germans are just TOO logical and efficient!) But for me it was the button to fire the guns/lasers/torpedoes during the "Neat Stories".
•Fate: I had it for only days when I drove it off to my second year of college and parked it on the street. Being a clueless teenager from the suburbs, I didn't know about street-sweeping and parking limitations. I assume it got a ticket early on in the week. It was gone Friday night when I went to go use it.
2) 1974 Chevrolet Kingswood Estate
•Nickname: "The Inertiamobile" Got its name from the second half of the principle of inertia: "an object in motion tends to remain in motion".
•Colour: Yellowish-Greenish with Faux Wood Paneling
•Transmission/Engine: Automatic, V8 engine
•Story: This was my mom's car for a long time before it was mine. Huge. Powerful. Room for all my college friends to pile in and go on road trips. It was much used and loved. Reached my land-speed record of 108mph in this vehicle. It wouldn't go a bit faster at all than that.
•Fate: When I moved back home it had a ripped up ceiling, the back window had been completely smashed, and one fender was almost falling off. My mom couldn't stand seeing it parked outside our house gave it away to someone who worked at the old-age home that my grandma lived at.
3) 1985 Honda Elite Scooter
•Nickname: None
•Colour: Blue
•Transmission/Engine: N/A and Not Much!
•Story: Inspired by the Grace Slick/Adam Ant commercials I decided to get one of these things. This was the only new vehicle I have ever owned. Was great for getting around - had to totally pay attention to the surface of the road however! And could park it anywhere!!! Had a terrible design flaw where the muffler was only attached to the scooter by a long thin pipe which cracked very easily when riding over a pothole. Must have bought 5 mufflers for the thing! Installed a joke "Ejector Seat" red button on the console. Wiped out once on slick metal rails on street once.
•Fate: Outlived its usefulness in my current transit-rich city. Sold it to a friend for $1 and it was towed away soon after he had it.
4) 1989 Isuzu Pickup
•Nickname: "Silver"
•Colour: you guessed it...Silver
•Transmission/Engine: Stickshift, V6 engine
•Story: First car I bought - had about 5,000 miles on it. The previous owners told me "it likes to go 70mph." They were right! Silver was a great truck and got me to The Racetrack in Death Valley...and back several times!
•Fate: In 2002 I put a "For Sale" sign on it and parked it in the street. It was only a matter of hours before some gardeners bought it with cash. I still have $1 of that money.
5) 1997 Ford Explorer
•Nickname: "The Cañyonero"
•Colour: Teal
•Transmission/Engine: Automatic, V-8 race-car engine, all-wheel drive.
•Story: My partner and I bought this slightly-used vehicle. We were big guys, and were planning to be shuttling other big guys around. It has been off-roading once. Was broken into twice - same window. The first time the thieves stole some clothes and missed the valuables. The second time the thief broke in to see what was in the big empty plastic container that holds up the back of the broken driver's seat and got NOTHING - not even the pennies in the glove compartment! Had its tire slashed once along with 5 other cars on the street - at least it wasn't personal!
•Fate: It lives on the street half-way across town from me. I drive it to work once every two weeks to avoid the tickets and towing from the street I park on.
6) What will the future bring?
I have no current plans for replacing The Cañyonero.
tolstoyVehicles I have owned. 1) 1969 Volkswagon Beetle
•Nickname: "The Bug"
•Colour: Tan
•Transmission/Engine: V4, Automatic stickshift. Yes. An automatic stickshift. Had a stick, but no pedal to push. When you touched the knob of the stickshift the engine went into neutral.
•Story: This was my dad's car that he drove to work. When I was little my oldest brother would tell me "Neat Stories" while we drove around - basically he just made up shit. I loved it! The coolest thing about this vehicles was the "Check Check Brakes Light". In the middle of the dashboard was a red button/light with a "B" on it. When you pushed it, it lit up red. Apparently if it ever lit up on its own, your brakes had failed. Therefore you could push it to make sure that the red light hadn't burned out and that your brakes had already failed but you didn't know it. (Sometimes Germans are just TOO logical and efficient!) But for me it was the button to fire the guns/lasers/torpedoes during the "Neat Stories".
•Fate: I had it for only days when I drove it off to my second year of college and parked it on the street. Being a clueless teenager from the suburbs, I didn't know about street-sweeping and parking limitations. I assume it got a ticket early on in the week. It was gone Friday night when I went to go use it.
2) 1974 Chevrolet Kingswood Estate
•Nickname: "The Inertiamobile" Got its name from the second half of the principle of inertia: "an object in motion tends to remain in motion".
•Colour: Yellowish-Greenish with Faux Wood Paneling
•Transmission/Engine: Automatic, V8 engine
•Story: This was my mom's car for a long time before it was mine. Huge. Powerful. Room for all my college friends to pile in and go on road trips. It was much used and loved. Reached my land-speed record of 108mph in this vehicle. It wouldn't go a bit faster at all than that.
•Fate: When I moved back home it had a ripped up ceiling, the back window had been completely smashed, and one fender was almost falling off. My mom couldn't stand seeing it parked outside our house gave it away to someone who worked at the old-age home that my grandma lived at.
3) 1985 Honda Elite Scooter
•Nickname: None
•Colour: Blue
•Transmission/Engine: N/A and Not Much!
•Story: Inspired by the Grace Slick/Adam Ant commercials I decided to get one of these things. This was the only new vehicle I have ever owned. Was great for getting around - had to totally pay attention to the surface of the road however! And could park it anywhere!!! Had a terrible design flaw where the muffler was only attached to the scooter by a long thin pipe which cracked very easily when riding over a pothole. Must have bought 5 mufflers for the thing! Installed a joke "Ejector Seat" red button on the console. Wiped out once on slick metal rails on street once.
•Fate: Outlived its usefulness in my current transit-rich city. Sold it to a friend for $1 and it was towed away soon after he had it.
4) 1989 Isuzu Pickup
•Nickname: "Silver"
•Colour: you guessed it...Silver
•Transmission/Engine: Stickshift, V6 engine
•Story: First car I bought - had about 5,000 miles on it. The previous owners told me "it likes to go 70mph." They were right! Silver was a great truck and got me to The Racetrack in Death Valley...and back several times!
•Fate: In 2002 I put a "For Sale" sign on it and parked it in the street. It was only a matter of hours before some gardeners bought it with cash. I still have $1 of that money.
5) 1997 Ford Explorer
•Nickname: "The Cañyonero"
•Colour: Teal
•Transmission/Engine: Automatic, V-8 race-car engine, all-wheel drive.
•Story: My partner and I bought this slightly-used vehicle. We were big guys, and were planning to be shuttling other big guys around. It has been off-roading once. Was broken into twice - same window. The first time the thieves stole some clothes and missed the valuables. The second time the thief broke in to see what was in the big empty plastic container that holds up the back of the broken driver's seat and got NOTHING - not even the pennies in the glove compartment! Had its tire slashed once along with 5 other cars on the street - at least it wasn't personal!
•Fate: It lives on the street half-way across town from me. I drive it to work once every two weeks to avoid the tickets and towing from the street I park on.
6) What will the future bring?
I have no current plans for replacing The Cañyonero.
I didn't see the 97 Explorer in your list...and then I remembered another vehicle of mine I had totally forgotten because it wasn't a car!