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Great...etc
10 years ago
To answer the question so many have asked: Can mom be medicated so she will tolerate the mask better? The answer is no. Her lungs would fill with fluid and she'd drown.
Believe me, we've asked.
Also, I just found out that the "treatment" she was due to receive wasn't treatment at all, but *staging* for that treatment. A preliminary workup, as it were. They weren't due to start the actual treatment for another two weeks. They can't *do* the treatment until they set the stage, but they couldn't do it until she built up her strength anyway, so they've sent her off to rehab to do just that.
So... She has two weeks to change her mind. By then, she may be stronger and better equipped to deal with it.
For those of you who have asked me to see her side of it... Believe me, I do. I'm not going to force her to do anything she doesn't want to do --Outside of maybe pulling a guilt-trip now and then. She's fully competent; just overwhelmed. Once she's in rehab, and actually DOING something about this, she may decide to fight after all.
I can hope, anyway.
No one is going to abandon this woman. We love her. But we are a little pissed-off that she won't try when she has been told this cancer is treatable with a good to very good chance of recovery.
It's like someone threw her a lifeline and she won't swim over to grab it because it's too much work.
*sigh...*
Anyway, they've sent her to Salisbury MD, which is a good hour+ each way and will cut down our visiting time. (I was going twice a day. Now it'll be more like 3 x a week.) This will allow me to rest some, so I can deal with the mess if she still decides she wants to jump off a cliff.
I won't stop her, if that's what she really wants to do, but no one said I had to make it easy.
Believe me, we've asked.
Also, I just found out that the "treatment" she was due to receive wasn't treatment at all, but *staging* for that treatment. A preliminary workup, as it were. They weren't due to start the actual treatment for another two weeks. They can't *do* the treatment until they set the stage, but they couldn't do it until she built up her strength anyway, so they've sent her off to rehab to do just that.
So... She has two weeks to change her mind. By then, she may be stronger and better equipped to deal with it.
For those of you who have asked me to see her side of it... Believe me, I do. I'm not going to force her to do anything she doesn't want to do --Outside of maybe pulling a guilt-trip now and then. She's fully competent; just overwhelmed. Once she's in rehab, and actually DOING something about this, she may decide to fight after all.
I can hope, anyway.
No one is going to abandon this woman. We love her. But we are a little pissed-off that she won't try when she has been told this cancer is treatable with a good to very good chance of recovery.
It's like someone threw her a lifeline and she won't swim over to grab it because it's too much work.
*sigh...*
Anyway, they've sent her to Salisbury MD, which is a good hour+ each way and will cut down our visiting time. (I was going twice a day. Now it'll be more like 3 x a week.) This will allow me to rest some, so I can deal with the mess if she still decides she wants to jump off a cliff.
I won't stop her, if that's what she really wants to do, but no one said I had to make it easy.
You are very strong for being the one with their head on their shoulders during all this.
Just hang in there, I wish you and your mom well
I hope that you are at least able to take care of yourself in this mess and that you take the time to make she that everything is in order legally while you have the time to be able to ask your mother questions to avoid problems with other family later.
Keep talking, we are listening even if we don't have the words to reply at this time.
I hope things make a turn for the better soon