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At my job.....
10 years ago
I have seen some incredible things.
Today, a man named Joe, and his friend Tim.
they didn't know it, but fate would put them on a play of such biblical scale that i will never again view my job with a level of seriousness required by a professional manager.
you see, these two work for a company thats all about signs. starbucks signs in the case of my warehouse.
Now these signs im throwing out on their behalf...they are huge things too...and dont want to sit on my forklift blades very well. but the lift is NEEDED because the damed screens are too heavy to be lifted by even a small group of people.
So Joe decides to be a counter weight and stands on top of the screens, i find this to be a really stupid idea. i tell him to get the fuck off because this will end badly for him.
well...God heard my warning, and decided that Joe would be PERFECT for a life lesson, so while he was standing on a screen. Tim moves something attached to the screens to cause the product to shift to the left.
Joe looses balance.
he flails, screams a bit...
...
and then farts.
only....
....
it wasn't just a fart.
With the full force of fear and impending death, he bulges the back of his pants, and it was heralded by a trumpet that was loud enough to make my soda in my cup holder ripple as if a t-rex had stomped near it.
Boom....the entire warehouse is silent, all stunned by this shittastic display. like a sleezy strip bar, joe stood on this half manged platform looking like he was about to grow a tail.
I wonder....
Does this happen to all managers?
Or do i just have an Aura of bad luck?
Today, a man named Joe, and his friend Tim.
they didn't know it, but fate would put them on a play of such biblical scale that i will never again view my job with a level of seriousness required by a professional manager.
you see, these two work for a company thats all about signs. starbucks signs in the case of my warehouse.
Now these signs im throwing out on their behalf...they are huge things too...and dont want to sit on my forklift blades very well. but the lift is NEEDED because the damed screens are too heavy to be lifted by even a small group of people.
So Joe decides to be a counter weight and stands on top of the screens, i find this to be a really stupid idea. i tell him to get the fuck off because this will end badly for him.
well...God heard my warning, and decided that Joe would be PERFECT for a life lesson, so while he was standing on a screen. Tim moves something attached to the screens to cause the product to shift to the left.
Joe looses balance.
he flails, screams a bit...
...
and then farts.
only....
....
it wasn't just a fart.
With the full force of fear and impending death, he bulges the back of his pants, and it was heralded by a trumpet that was loud enough to make my soda in my cup holder ripple as if a t-rex had stomped near it.
Boom....the entire warehouse is silent, all stunned by this shittastic display. like a sleezy strip bar, joe stood on this half manged platform looking like he was about to grow a tail.
I wonder....
Does this happen to all managers?
Or do i just have an Aura of bad luck?
