Okay I know a lot of you thought I was doing better when I posted that thingy. Well I was, for a day, but now I'm back in bed the last 3. ;w; I really am not sure what is going on with me, but I feel super awful, and the other night I had an anxiety attack/panic attack and thought I was dying. It was disturbing as all heck and I ended up crying in bed, afraid to go to sleep so I watched cartoons. But that's not the main point. I can barely eat, I"m losing weight, I can't even sit up in bed. I've been this way for three weeks with no apparent reason as to why. The only clue that is known is that I developed an allergy to my own saliva. Now things are actually getting worse for me. Aside from feeling awful and being unable to do anything, now I'm getting weird allergic reactions to food as soon as I eat. I start getting chills down one side of my body, and break out in this giant itchy rash across half of my body.

So for those of you who pray, your prayers would be greatly appreciated. I'm honestly not sure at all what's up and there's not much I can do until I can get in to see my specialist on the 17th. He wants to check and see if I've developed ulcers or really bad erosion from some of my other issues.

So I know I say this a lot, but I'm not ignoring you guys, I really WANT to interact, but I've just been feeling so awful that about all I have the strength to do is view some of those comments.

I won't lie, I am a bit down. Not depressed, just discouraged, and decently scared. I presume I'll probably get better, but when it goes on this long it always makes me wonder if its my new normal (because that has happened over the years where things get worse and then they stay that way.) And the fear comes from not being able to do what I love, naturally. =. So yeah, going through a rough patch here.

Obviously me being unable to get up effects the progress of commissions. I actually am still working on a set up that allows me to work some from bed, but with how awful I've been feeling, even that is not a plausible option at the moment. So no, I'm not saying that anyone's commission is cancelled, just that this is why its taking me longer.