My life seems sort of meaningless to me right now. Like I have no direction, or purpose really. I'm trying to fill my life with things that inspire me. Though that doesn't really seem to help.

I overslept today and missed both of my classes. How dumb is that? Why can't I be happy anymore? I just signed up for Taekwondo and I got my sewing machine working so I can start making fursuit parts...but it's like none of that matters anymore. It doesn't fill the void I have within myself.

I don't know why I'm so unmotivated with my life and why I'm so depressed. I want my own space. But I don't want to move out. I want to live with my mom but I know that where she is that there's really nothing left for me there, but an empty room for me to spend my sorrows in.

I want to make my parents proud of me but I feel as though I'm just constantly letting them down. I don't feel like I'm a part of this family and they clearly point it out on a daily basis. Constantly telling me I need to change my attitude, and to live as though I'm a freeloader. I feel so alone. So empty trapped in this human shell. I just want to be happy and I can't.

I don't know what to do with myself. The tears won't stop. I need help.