It's another one of those nights... stuck awake thinking about myself and the future... wanting hope and not really seeing a lot of reasons to.... Kind of depressed and kind of anxious.

It doesn't help that I have gained a lot of weight in the last month and a half due to being forced into inactivity and I feel more ugly then usual.... which is saying something for someone who considers himself close to the elephant man at times.

Sitting here listening to "4 chords" and wondering about life.... odd mix I guess but... murph.

I will be going to MFF later this year as an update. I probably won;t actually attend the con itself, but I have to drop off a motorcycle for  jackthecoonbro's friend. I am going to try and visit an old friend at the same time.

Trying to get my truck painted has been.... an experience.... no one is willing to paint it down here for anything less than 800 so I am going to have to try and do it myself.... I'll keep people updated if I cn remember to...

Just lately feeling... very low and useless/ineffective. Like the old mechanical feeling I used to have... like I am only there to provide funds to people.... otherwise forgotten.

Sorry to bother people.