gotten to point say this many times but this time seem more true than i wanted admit to my self at given times.
I'm Reindeer that tend hide in darkest parts just build up wall all around my self to keep world away from me,i felt this way for really long time in my life just gotten worse with age.i haven't many positive reinforcements to go out my comforted zone in all my life....only had few.....my aunt going nuts keep me more even in state of fear for time she did.....I gone out limb once for one person was in trouble i loved them gave them home... than 3 good year with them before the pass away my first and only real life boyfriend....personally i don't want go thought hurt.... had gone thought losing my both my grandparents growing up... i very small family now...
I can't count my sister she turn in royal bitch to me,my mom and dad after she had kid... her husband is good guy.
I'm reindeer kind lost path when was really young when i keep getting picked,made fun,get called names for doing nothing... never harming someone... i think did because wasn't norm for guy and i keep to my self.
i'm emotionally damaged from other thoughtless actions to me over some royal dumb things.. make worse my one my own family did to me to.
i hide to keep away from world to keep my self safe from other actions sometimes meaningful other time not so...
Sorry if i don't talk much...my social skills kind lacking so i don't talk much some times
i'm venting out some just bottle up emotions that just part of huge build up.
*goes back to bed than goes lay down with bunch covers over top self head to hoof with antlers be seen with covers over them.*