So tomorrow at my church, there is to be a ritual called a Burning Bowl Ceremony. I've heard of several iterations of this; most of them involve a piece of flash paper, such as magicians use. All of them involve writing on the flash paper. Some suggest writing not only things you wish to release from the previous year, but things you wish to embrace for the coming year.

Whatever the case, you write it down and touch the paper to a flame which is kindled in a fireproof bowl of some kind, and it basically vanishes before your eyes. Quite powerful, symbolically.

In the same spirit, I'm tired of just resolving things. I thought of something I like better.

New Year's Ritual
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What have I learned?

I am stronger and wiser than I would have imagined.

I am less patient and more angry, too.

My insights are often completely accurate and I do myself
and everyone around me a grievous injustice by not voicing
them insistently. My opinions, observations, and decisions are ultimately valid and worthy of consideration.

Some people are not healthy enough to have a front-row seat
in my life. I was taught that you only ride shotgun if you're willing and able to stay awake and open fire.

There is a creative solution to everything if I'm willing to find the fun within the problem.

Furry has an element of shamanism/totemism that's worth exploring. I have depths that I've ignored for too long, and bringing them to light will likely serve me well.
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What do I Release?

The habit of allowing myself to be enslaved, continuously
finding myself in situations where I feel it necessary to
completely deny myself in order to continue living. My values
are going to make this difficult. But my playing small serves
no-one.

The habit of denying myself a voice, choosing passive
aggression and conflict avoidance instead of stepping up and
refusing to allow that which grieves me to pass unchallenged,
especially if it is because I believe I will do harm instead
of good by acting on what's in my heart.

The habit of disrespecting myself, denying my needs,
choosing to be miserable or undermine myself and my own
happiness.

The habit of self-soubt, in which I do not believe I am
sufficient to accomplish what I set out to do.

The Habit of justifying my unwillingness to participate
in things I consider a waste of time by resorting to
illness, pain, injury, disease, and other victim beliefs
regarding my own frailty.

I release others from being so close to my fire that I might burn them.

I release myself from those who would starve or douse me to keep themselves safe from my flames, instead of moving back to a safe distance.

I release myself from the kingdom of hell.

I release the habit of seeing only what I lack.

I release the habit of Victimhood.

I release filth and clutter in my environment.
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What do I embrace/Welcome?

I embrace freedom: freedom in prosperity, freedom of movement, freedom in the form of agency and valid consent.

I embrace my Voice, my Truth, my validity and worthiness to be heard.

I embrace those people who can truly benefit from being close to me.

I embrace the practice of grattitude.

I embrace the practice of focusing on what I have.

I embrace the practice of seeking the kingdom in all that I do.

I embrace compassion tempered with sternness.

I embrace courage and self-reliance.

I embrace health, growth, and vitality.

I embrace Power and the Responsibility that comes with it.

I embrace cleanliness, order, and accessibility in my life.
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What Am I Grateful For?

The companions I have who've seen me through hardship and been a constant support.

The lessons, even the hard ones. No. Especially the hard ones. And for my ability to learn from them.

The principles of the universe which, by learning to cooperate with them, have provided always exactly what was necessary to solve a problem exactly when I needed it most, and have often provided for my desires in unexpected but welcome ways.

For my strengths, and for the people who've helped me to see them in new ways I wouldn't have considered.
=====================================

What am I Looking Forward to?

Continuing to receive Lootcrates!

My sister and her kids FINALLY going to Japan! And things getting somewhat back to normal as a result c.c;;;

Renewing my pass to Big Lagoon

Becoming a youth sponsor at my church, if it's a good match.

Flying to Canada for Fur,eh?

Seeing Matt again, and going shooting!

Seeing Wildmark again and going beachcombing!

Turning 32. I haven't been an age that was a multiple of eight since I was 24! Though, being an odd prime is pretty cool, I don't have to wait as long between those.

The Las Cruces Rennaisance fair?

MFF 2016



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How do I want to Grow?


I want at least one working vehicle in my name and at my disposal. I have two candidate vehicles which can be brought to working order for less than the cost of buying a seviceable used vehicle, so it's a question of money and maybe an odd second pair of hands.

I want to be covering 100% of my personal expenses and have an excess of unallocated income to do with as I please.
As I please consisting of rewards, investments, and giving to causes I consider worthy. In particular:
-I want to be able to contribute to at least one patreon account in a significant way
-I want to be a supporter of a specific social media outlet.
-I'd like to purchase a membership pass to the state parks here in Florida again this year
- I want to keep getting lootcrates as a subscription
- I'd like to be an Exceptional Friend in Fallen London
- Having memberships at a couple of places I like to shop is also very practical.


I want to complete at least one major costuming project in time for MFF. I have several possible options on the table:
- Fursuit
- Armor
- Transformers MTMTE cosplay

I want to be able to wear size 38-40" pants and L-XL shirts comfortably, as well as be able to play around and have fun and do my work without serious risk of injury.
I intend to do this by restoring my eating habits to their state as of 18 months ago, and by getting back into Fighting, Dancing, Hiking, Swimming, qigong and resistance training as well as just general playing around and having fun.

I want to fix my windsurfer.

I want to unfuck my house. This entails:
- Applying the KonMari method to the entire standing structure.
- Minor repairs/renovations to most of the rooms in the house
- Extensive landscaping.
- Repair or Replacement of the Hot water Heater and, if at all possible, the HVAC. Winter's not so damn bad without a heater but summer is fucking impossible with just window units.
- Replacing two toilets and building a new sink in my bathroom.
- Installing a work bench in my studio
- Upgrading my bed to something suitable instead of a mattress on the floor.

I want to have a mobile setup for all of my fabrication equipment which is practically portable. This just means having a workshop that fits easily on a dolly and thence into the backseat or trunk of a car, and sets up and breaks down in under ten minutes.

I want to have a passport.

I want to finish a number of outstanding art projects (looking at you, Wildmark comic).

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What do I Resolve?

That 2016 will be the best year I've lived yet.