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To close a chapter
16 years ago
General
For those who've been following this little saga...
I could have done without the last two weeks. My whole immediate family could've done without the last two weeks. Mum had deteriorated somewhat rapidly from the effects of the breast cancer she's been battling for 2 1/2 years. She was gravely ill in the local hospital when my older brother and I arrived. A few days later, in the early morning of the 2nd of May, she passed away in my father's arms.
I miss her already. She was a kind, sweet, loving person, and she didn't in the slightest deserve what she had to go through. She deserved better than that.
Most of the last week has involved my elder brother, my father, and myself going through photos and doing other things to organise her memorial service. And occasionally crying, of course, but we're all manly men so I won't mention that.
Not many people get to perform at their own memorials. My mother did. Mum was a talented classical soprano, and though she never got around to getting professionally recorded, in the days after her death we were very fortunate to find a few cassette tapes of a few public performances she gave in the 90's. Not exactly high-fidelity recordings, but it's her, and after I did my best to remove the tape hiss noise and make it as presentable as possible, we decided to make her singing a major feature of the memorial. She loved her music. It seemed to have gone down well; after her final piece, the end of the service, the audience spontaneously applauded.
The local town art esteadford is planning on introducing a vocal section. Touchingly, they're planning to name it in her honour.
It's going to take a while to get used to her being gone. I was at dinner a couple of nights ago with some relatives of my sister-in-law and, for a split second, found myself looking around wondering where Mum had gotten to. Each time it happens the realisation that follows will always be a little depressing. I feel for Dad. He's strong, but it's surely tough after having been together for just over 40 years.
Thanks to all who've shown interest and given sympathy, I appreciate it. As for art, don't worry. It'll be back soon enough. If you still can, go show your mum some love. It is the appropriate day, after all.
I could have done without the last two weeks. My whole immediate family could've done without the last two weeks. Mum had deteriorated somewhat rapidly from the effects of the breast cancer she's been battling for 2 1/2 years. She was gravely ill in the local hospital when my older brother and I arrived. A few days later, in the early morning of the 2nd of May, she passed away in my father's arms.
I miss her already. She was a kind, sweet, loving person, and she didn't in the slightest deserve what she had to go through. She deserved better than that.
Most of the last week has involved my elder brother, my father, and myself going through photos and doing other things to organise her memorial service. And occasionally crying, of course, but we're all manly men so I won't mention that.
Not many people get to perform at their own memorials. My mother did. Mum was a talented classical soprano, and though she never got around to getting professionally recorded, in the days after her death we were very fortunate to find a few cassette tapes of a few public performances she gave in the 90's. Not exactly high-fidelity recordings, but it's her, and after I did my best to remove the tape hiss noise and make it as presentable as possible, we decided to make her singing a major feature of the memorial. She loved her music. It seemed to have gone down well; after her final piece, the end of the service, the audience spontaneously applauded.
The local town art esteadford is planning on introducing a vocal section. Touchingly, they're planning to name it in her honour.
It's going to take a while to get used to her being gone. I was at dinner a couple of nights ago with some relatives of my sister-in-law and, for a split second, found myself looking around wondering where Mum had gotten to. Each time it happens the realisation that follows will always be a little depressing. I feel for Dad. He's strong, but it's surely tough after having been together for just over 40 years.
Thanks to all who've shown interest and given sympathy, I appreciate it. As for art, don't worry. It'll be back soon enough. If you still can, go show your mum some love. It is the appropriate day, after all.
P
Cancer is never fair.
Closure isn't about moving on as if nothing has changed. More the opposite. Closure is about recognising and being at terms with what happened.
I hope your grief is swift, but not lacking in resolution.
Anyway, thanks, Foxy.
(And purely for the sake of accuracy, she actually had 3 sons. I didn't mention my other elder brother because being mentally handicapped and living in care accommodation he wasn't in a position to help us with the memorial. Frankly, I'm not sure how much he understood of what's happened. It's very hard to tell how much gets through to him. But I digress.)