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old poor horse ramblings...
16 years ago
Every beast has something to say
Well, first this i sthe second time Im uploading a journal just to... well... I guess the proper word is RANT... but Im not ranting. I guess I just need some... well... supportive feedback.
As many of you know, I live with my parents and two sisters. wich means Im still a parasite. in Franco house, Mother, Father and Big Sister were the pillars. and things ran smoothly for a few years. we even could afford some luxuries, such as internet, car, good clothing and other whims that come at random.
Recently, things have gone a bit harsh in my family. About one year ago, My Father-s Boss and employer died. so Father lost the job. He, however found another one quickly. two part-time jobs as a personal driver for well.. richer persons... you know, -Franco, take me to the bank, Franco, Take me to Church, Franco take me to pedicura-
also, sister is a graduate architect. he worked for a long time in a place that paid well, but in the recent monts she became too unconfortable with the job, so she just quit.
also Father quit from one job, and was fired from the other.
So we can only trust in Mother-s nurse salary to keep the family up.
Today I learned that we have about 12 dollars in our pockets to go trough the week... Fear not. its not like we are already selling our house. I seriously hope this.. shall we say little tiny hole will be outmanouvered soon.
I Know... Im sure everyone will understand how I feel. Im not being emo or pesimistic. And Im not blaming you none of you or even requesting help or monetary assistance. No thats not like me.
I am, however feeling rather sad about this situation. and yes, I am, somehow and indirectly looking for a job too.
heh. this journal has gone too long so I guess Ill just shut up.
I know I am going to recieve supportive feedback from those who care. and to those, thank you. I hope you understand If Im depressed when we talk...
Hehehe. I just..... needed to say it to someone...
As many of you know, I live with my parents and two sisters. wich means Im still a parasite. in Franco house, Mother, Father and Big Sister were the pillars. and things ran smoothly for a few years. we even could afford some luxuries, such as internet, car, good clothing and other whims that come at random.
Recently, things have gone a bit harsh in my family. About one year ago, My Father-s Boss and employer died. so Father lost the job. He, however found another one quickly. two part-time jobs as a personal driver for well.. richer persons... you know, -Franco, take me to the bank, Franco, Take me to Church, Franco take me to pedicura-
also, sister is a graduate architect. he worked for a long time in a place that paid well, but in the recent monts she became too unconfortable with the job, so she just quit.
also Father quit from one job, and was fired from the other.
So we can only trust in Mother-s nurse salary to keep the family up.
Today I learned that we have about 12 dollars in our pockets to go trough the week... Fear not. its not like we are already selling our house. I seriously hope this.. shall we say little tiny hole will be outmanouvered soon.
I Know... Im sure everyone will understand how I feel. Im not being emo or pesimistic. And Im not blaming you none of you or even requesting help or monetary assistance. No thats not like me.
I am, however feeling rather sad about this situation. and yes, I am, somehow and indirectly looking for a job too.
heh. this journal has gone too long so I guess Ill just shut up.
I know I am going to recieve supportive feedback from those who care. and to those, thank you. I hope you understand If Im depressed when we talk...
Hehehe. I just..... needed to say it to someone...
~X
suerte ._.
I live very close to Mexican border now, so am in a lot closer proximity to poverty stricken people and it means also I am a poorer person myself, but nowhere near as bad off as you. It's just basically meant I've had to leave everybody I've ever had as a friend behind, and after 6 years of living here, still stayed friendless.
A job is a big part of one's life, so is a home. Losing both causes a big upset in terms of identity, of stability, it's a loss of happiness - even if you weren't that happy with these two things, ironically!
Until things better, misery will be yours. It is not fair, so you suffer. It is time to consult whatever spiritual comforts you can find, for that is why they are there. It is also why friends are here and on the net.
It's not fair, and it's normal to feel depressed, even picked on by fate or some higher power when things like this happen. But it's generally due to the affairs of low-income people, in all nations, seldom improve. It's a matter of statistics. Sometimes it is possible to beat the odds, but the great majority of us have to cope with not having done so.
You do seem to be used a lot, but you really are depended upon right now, and if it helps any, consider youself as the "work horse." I remember being in a science museum where there was a bicycle you had to pedal fast to make a light bulb go on, that had a meter on it that would tell you how many horsepower you were generating.
At best, I could manage maybe one-eighth horsepower, and that was a peak! Not sustained. Most people seem to be similar. So this is your time to be strong. It is hard times that build character, that test whether we can be strong. And a horse is supposed to be 8 times stronger than an ordinary man. This is your chance to show us you have that inside. Try and find it, and see if you do have the extra fuerte that I may never know.
Better days to you Franco.
... Also... I dont remember telling you my name...
No human can be 8x as powerful as another, as far as history goes - maybe one was in ancient times, maybe a few. It's up to you to try and grow a little bit like your icon grows. :)