Now I know what your thinking, "Everyone is..." "I'm tight and need to save up".....but thats just the thing, I can't save in the first place cause I don't have a job yet, which is proving difficult....I have tried everywere and have gotten no calls back, no actual intrests...and I'm doing everything in my power to be plain for the interviews and be proffesional. I just need some type of steady funds......like for instance on my Patreon, even just a dollar a month helps...I just really need some income so I can help my bf around the house, and get important things. My first goal is to save up to pay off my bank with my over draft, and once I get a steady amount of money to be able to re-open my bank again....I dunno what I am doing wrong here, I know I'm un exprianced but I am a fast learner and I am willing to learn new things....But every were is just not being nice :(. I really feel useless, and caught in that moment were I dunno were to go, I've been sitting down at this cross road for ever now, not going anywere.. Watching the people in my life pass by over and over again...they are going some were, whilst I am not....I would like to go some were, meet new people and learn new things....I really feel a lone in this adventure.....I wanna be able to get nice things for my family and myself.....but I can't....and it hurts me a lot to know a practically disabled woman that lives with us got a job in over a couple of weeks, over me for handing out resume's to the same spot for a year!!.....experianced or not..I should have been asked first........truthfully I am very aggrivated....and upset at this fact...I felt lower then low...and useless.....she didnt' even put in a good word for me when another girl had been fired......I feel depressed a lot lately and I can't tell anyone or they give me some sob story of there own thinking its way worse when it's not....they have no idea how it feels...they've have no troubles getting jobs in todays society...they have had chances to get the experiance unlike me....that's the only reason they have there jobs...when I try to gain the experiance I am rejected and made to feel like a fool for even trying....or useless....and thinking all this isn't healthy I know....but it hurts so bad when you've been rejected for a year now out of a job.....sorry for ranting so long.....at this point I've kinda put myself down again....donate or not....I won't force anyone....I understand other people have there own issues and things to deal with.....heck I'd through in as much art as the donator would like, if that's a fair trade...but if you think not it's okay....no hard feelings......I'm just gonna go play a game or something...dunno yet....dunno if I have the energy to do anything today....just...bleh.....Chow....

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