Hello guys, I have something that I would like to say and I'll appreciate it if you bare with me here and try to be understanding...

For quite some time I been getting the feeling that I'm being judged based on my ethnicity, coming from the middle east it appears many people have issues with me or feel uneasy because of this, some even push me away or look down to me, I want you all to know I have nothing but respect to all of you, I respect all cultures and believes, and if I have said or did anything that made you feel uncomfortable know that I never meant it in an offensive way, I either did it to make a point or explain something and I apologize if I have hurt anyone.

I'm writing this journal with tears on my eyes, I couldn't sleep well last night as I been thinking of a few comments I had with a couple of friends of mine, I had to get off the bed to make this journal, hoping that someone would read it.

I cannot tell you how many times I felt like certain people have rejected me or blocked me (either emotionally or physically) the minute they learned I come from the middle east, yes I'm Arab, but is that really a bad thing?

You see, I maybe Arabian but I'm an open minded one, in my culture I've always been rejected, people often tell me that my way of thinking is "too western-like" and that I'm "not religious enough", it's funny cause many westerns seem to think I'm "way too religious", that being said, I've always felt more comfortable around westerns, talking to them, working with them, having them as friends, they seem to accept me and understand me more than most people in my country, I feel like my way of thinking is closer to westerns than easterns and that I understand your lifestyle even more than I understand ours, that's not to say that our lifestyle is wrong, this is not a black and white situation my friends, I'm afraid this is a grey one and I know enough about both cultures to tell you that both parties are at fault, though I won't get into details here.

At university my major was English Literature (believe it or not) I've always been fascinated with the western culture and I've always liked the English language, studying English literature we were taught that by learning a new language you don't just learn said language but the culture associated with it, this of course includes religion, I learned some stuff about Christianity and other religions not only because it was part of the curriculum but also because I was interested, I always been curious to learn more about different cultures and they say knowledge is power.

I know many westerns are sensitive when it comes to religion, they often censor any religious terms when translation a foreigner show or anime, I watch enough anime to know when the guy says "God bless you" and the translation changes it to "Good luck" or when he says "Thank God" and is translated to "I'm happy to hear that", I know all about this which is why I try to stay away from using religious terms when talking to westerns, be it in real life or even online.

However what most of you don't understand is unlike the situation in the west, here in the middle east religion takes a big part of our culture, our everyday speak is full of religious terms, even those who are not religious use them unintentionally, it's impossible to take away the religious terms due to the way the language works so excuse me if my language barriers result me in mentioning religious terms as I come from a different culture and I speak a different language.

Look guys, I have nothing but respect to all of you, even those who done me wrong I have no hard feelings for them, I accepted your lifestyle, why can't you accept mine? :'(