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Adventures at the Zoo! Part One
16 years ago
We have a new temporary exhibit at the zoo where I work, with the theme of Madagascar! The poster child for this exhibit is the fossa, of whom I've previously spoken very affectionate words.
Part of my job in this exhibit is to just stand in front of the fossa enclosure and tell everyone about it, and answer their questions, since no one actually knows what the fuck a fossa is. Usually the male fossa is either striking a pose or curled up adorably. Today, however.. well, he was curled up adorably. But for some reason I cannot fathom, as he lay there all comfortable, his penis slowly started edging out of his underbelly, out of its sheath, and lay there fully erect in plain view of every single guest who even glanced his way. AUGH.
I mean, personally this isn't a problem for me. You spend time around animals, you see animal penises, that's just how it is. But when the guests were staring at it in wonder (it is a very bizarre-looking organ) and asking me what in the world that thing was, I just didn't know how to answer. And it was even more awkward when the poor mothers recognized it right away and dragged their gaggles of children away from the enclosure as fast as they could with a kind of panicked urgency that made me feel guilty despite myself.
After about 15 minutes or so of that hell, with guests streaming past the whole time, of course, the fossa finished his wet dream or whatever it was, causing me no small amount of relief. But hey, at least I've got this colorful memory. I'm sure I'll appreciate it in about a decade or so.
Part of my job in this exhibit is to just stand in front of the fossa enclosure and tell everyone about it, and answer their questions, since no one actually knows what the fuck a fossa is. Usually the male fossa is either striking a pose or curled up adorably. Today, however.. well, he was curled up adorably. But for some reason I cannot fathom, as he lay there all comfortable, his penis slowly started edging out of his underbelly, out of its sheath, and lay there fully erect in plain view of every single guest who even glanced his way. AUGH.
I mean, personally this isn't a problem for me. You spend time around animals, you see animal penises, that's just how it is. But when the guests were staring at it in wonder (it is a very bizarre-looking organ) and asking me what in the world that thing was, I just didn't know how to answer. And it was even more awkward when the poor mothers recognized it right away and dragged their gaggles of children away from the enclosure as fast as they could with a kind of panicked urgency that made me feel guilty despite myself.
After about 15 minutes or so of that hell, with guests streaming past the whole time, of course, the fossa finished his wet dream or whatever it was, causing me no small amount of relief. But hey, at least I've got this colorful memory. I'm sure I'll appreciate it in about a decade or so.
You will very regret it
That
is fucking embarassing
and im all SASSY LAY DOWN LAY THE FUCK DOWN NIGGER
embarassing.
And as someone who's seen--and drawn--his fair share of fossa anatomy, I agree with you: it's certainly a unique organ. I would have taken my share of pictures, even if only to use them for anatomical reference later. Accuracy is an important cornerstone in my work--well, as accurate as I can be, at least. ;)
And your job is to stand in front of the fossa exhibit all day, eh? I tell ya, some people get to have all the fun!
-Ferox