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Story of my life...(vent post)
9 years ago
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Buy me Coffee <3This is a long post about my life, you dont have to read it. Most of it is depressing anywho. I just want to clear my head. And vent a little.
So I am sure or maybe a little sure some of you are confused about what is going on. I am raising money to get my mate a birthday present. No not my husband. Definitely not him. My husband, who will be my ex husband soon enough once he comes back from deployment was or is a douche.
He doesn't want to help me with bills, he sends me 200$ a month to support myself and tells me he can't help me. But he can buy a 100$ necklace for some girl in Kentucky....he says he doesn't need to help me b,but I am still his wife...Navy is a fucking asshole cause they don't care. I even found naked pictures of this girl. So he has been cheating on me for quite a while. I hate him, I wasted 6 years of my life with him. His grandma texted me yelling at me to pay bills when I can't...I am living off of 200$ a month and a semi part time job. I had unexpected bills...
I know, how can I say that I married him. Well once we moved to our first duty station our relationship started to go down hill. I wanted to see a marriage counselor but he said we were fine. My mate now, who was my husband friend at the time and my mates friends noticed he was treating me bad. But me, I don't like hurting people so I keep making excuses for him. Until one day me and my husband got into a fight coming home from dinner and he charged at me like he was going to beat me. If my mate/friend wasn't there I am sure he would have. So I have been mental, physically and sexual abused by my husband.
I went down hill from there. I started cutting myself. I started hating myself...till this day I semi do hate myself. But if I didn't have the friends and support I do from my mate. To be honest I would be dead.
Sorry for the post....I just want to get all of it off my chest. I feel like I can't go anywhere and no one wants to help.
So I am sure or maybe a little sure some of you are confused about what is going on. I am raising money to get my mate a birthday present. No not my husband. Definitely not him. My husband, who will be my ex husband soon enough once he comes back from deployment was or is a douche.
He doesn't want to help me with bills, he sends me 200$ a month to support myself and tells me he can't help me. But he can buy a 100$ necklace for some girl in Kentucky....he says he doesn't need to help me b,but I am still his wife...Navy is a fucking asshole cause they don't care. I even found naked pictures of this girl. So he has been cheating on me for quite a while. I hate him, I wasted 6 years of my life with him. His grandma texted me yelling at me to pay bills when I can't...I am living off of 200$ a month and a semi part time job. I had unexpected bills...
I know, how can I say that I married him. Well once we moved to our first duty station our relationship started to go down hill. I wanted to see a marriage counselor but he said we were fine. My mate now, who was my husband friend at the time and my mates friends noticed he was treating me bad. But me, I don't like hurting people so I keep making excuses for him. Until one day me and my husband got into a fight coming home from dinner and he charged at me like he was going to beat me. If my mate/friend wasn't there I am sure he would have. So I have been mental, physically and sexual abused by my husband.
I went down hill from there. I started cutting myself. I started hating myself...till this day I semi do hate myself. But if I didn't have the friends and support I do from my mate. To be honest I would be dead.
Sorry for the post....I just want to get all of it off my chest. I feel like I can't go anywhere and no one wants to help.
All I can say is .. Don't kill yourself, don't hurt yourself, don't hate yourself over jackass who treats you like shit because most likely he hates himself too and yes to make everybody else feel like shit because he wants to feel that power even though he's one of the shittiest person on earth .
I'm very sorry this happened to you.
But he'll fuck it up for him self . If things work out its because he's playing a game with her. Which isn't healthy.
Of course he'd try to make you feel bad just to you can stay and feel even more like shit. It's not your fault he said he was feeding you lies so you'd stay and I'm sure you did love him.. Which I'm really sorry this happened. But you really should tell his command !!! Let them know what kind of person he is.
His girlfriend is probably comfort food TBH.
But I'm glad you'll be free from his bullshit!! Do stay strong '
What an asshole!! Majority of military men are complete assholes, I'm sorry to say, my brother being a marine
and all he definitely changed after a year being in there, he turned into a complete douchebag.
Anyways, I'm so sorry you had to go through that, you're such a sweet person who doesn't deserve that! *hugs*
I know what it's like to be in the dark to hurt your self, to hate yourself, to feel alone like theres no way out. I'm still going through it ^^'
but I do know how youre feeling, it's not worth it get out of there as fast as you can, live life and be happy. Don't be under some scumbag's thumb
I'm glad you have people who are there for you! <:3 I'm still here if you need me! I wish you the best of luck.
Yeah leave him, he'll regret it in the end.