Hey guys.
So.. I've been back for almost 10 days now, but so much bad luck has hit me it's unbelievable.
My cousin and my step father both lost their jobs because they didn't piss clean.
Now, most of you don't know that myself and my family are all potheads. We smoke marijuana all the time since it's LEGAL in Oregon.
But in the working world, if you pop up not clean, you pop up not clean and you get terminated. Period. Now, granted, some jobs will be a little willing to work with you if you get clean and piss clean for 6 months to a year.
Unfortunately, my cousin and step father's jobs weren't willing to work with them so they got let go.
That being said.. My mum is now struggling with bills because she lost my step father's income which was about 1200 dollars a month, maybe more.
Which means, that financial strain is being tossed to me and my roommate to basically pick up my step father's side of things.
Now... My step father is an addict. If he's not smoking weed, he's drinking. If he's not drinking, he's hitting me up for my pain pills FOR MY BACK WHEN I HAD SURGERY! Now, I have no issue giving him some here and there for his arms, which he has issues with, but when he constantly hits me up with phantom pains, it becomes an issue.
To give a little background on why I have such an issue with him, I'll explain the home situation slightly.

My mum made my roommate get a job or he had to get out in 30 days. PERIOD. Now, he did get a job and everything, but my step father literally sat on his ass for MONTHS not doing shit to help my mum because he couldn't get clean for 1 month to pass a piss test for a job. He kept giving her empty promises about getting a job for MONTHS. Eventually, she had to give him an ultimatum. Get a job or get out. He had 30 days, like my roommate. Well, 30 days passed and he didn't get a job. She kept giving him time. Meanwhile, my roommate had to start giving my mum his checks to pay for rent AND for the rest of the bills she couldn't cover because my step father wouldn't get a fucking job.
Eventually, he got clean and started working at the job he now lost because he didn't stay clean to try and get a new position at the plant he worked at.

He's been outta work for almost 3 weeks now and he STILL is smoking weed. He won't fucking stop. My mum had to give him an ultimatum AGAIN! Quit smoking or leave.
I'm getting so sick and tired of seeing my mum so upset and struggling because of this man. I love my step father, don't get my wrong, but JESUS CHRIST! HELP YOUR FUCKING WIFE!! HELP YOUR FUCKING FAMILY!!
I'm sick of seeing my roommate not being able to do ANYTHING because he can't afford it being he has to pay for his own bills ON TOP of paying my mum rent and whatever else she asks.
All because my step father WON'T GET A JOB!
Now, don't get me wrong, my mum and my roommate agreed to him paying for rent and the internet, which is no issue. But she can't even afford to buy food for us now because my step father isn't working.

I'm so frustrated and stressed out that I can't even do art.. I owe people things and I can't even complete them without getting frustrated at my art to the point of tears.
And now I feel like I have to bring more money in with commissions because I want my roommate to be able to enjoy himself again.
I don't work currently because I am still constantly fighting my back issue which causes me to have constant surgeries. And these surgeries leave open wounds on my body which you can't have in a working environment because it's a "hygiene" issue as well as a issue I need help with. Basically, I can't work until my doctors and surgeons say I'm healed 100% and able to work.
Whatever little money I have, I make through commissions and selling adoptables, which isn't much because not many people order things from me or buy my adoptables often.
So, it's hard for me to even feel like I can bring my mum or my roommate some financial relief and happiness for once in this seriously strenuous time.

I feel so useless honestly because I can't help the ones I love dearly. It's seriously starting to bring me down quick, fast and hard. I don't know what to do about it anymore.
I'll go into why my vacation was so bad another time, but right now, this is what is truly effecting my working ability when it comes to my owed arts to people.

Talk about feelin' like a failure...