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About the Blackout...
9 years ago
General
So there was a journal posted Sunday on here that I was done period and was leaving. Some of you have posted in the comments or even note me being concerns on the very vague journal in question and I am very humble and sorry for what I did there. I would of posted this sooner but was working that next 2 days.
To better explain what happen or if you didn't see the post on Sunday; I was having a minor meltdown and going in damage mode on my channel. For those who don't already know( if this situation didn't clue in) I'm currently suffering with Depression. To explain this feeling is usually the though of some how not knowing that I dug myself into a hole and now gotten myself stuck inside. My efforts of trying to climb out of this hole (doing things to make me happy) has cause me to keep on falling back down (things going wrong or pessimistic thoughts) and just make it worst on my case. Because of this I have been lacking in content and creativity; this has also cause me with having problems with a few friends i keep in contact with, causing me to argue and be mad at one of them because I was getting envious and depress when I found them getting art of their ideas from others (when in the past I was more happy and was great to see). At first I though it was was because of financial security (not having a job that I could live off on), but after getting a job that "pays the bills" I discover my Depression was more than just that.
Now I'm not going to leave the channel or abandon this place (despite it already feeling like it) but I am going to try to do something to better help myself. Now I not going to get mediation cause it doesn't cure the sickness honestly nor does talking to a therapist. However these things will help hopefully get me out of my rut that I'm in.
- First is health, I feel I need to better myself by being active more often than I am ATM.
-Post shorter tfs and more fun ideas out more to test my skill and improve my art.
-Make a series I feel I like to work on and I will do it when ready.
-Making video game stream for Twitch and Youtube that doesn't bare the Octorber13 name
I hope you all can bare with me on this journey and I am sorry on what I did, I guess I was my cry for help
To better explain what happen or if you didn't see the post on Sunday; I was having a minor meltdown and going in damage mode on my channel. For those who don't already know( if this situation didn't clue in) I'm currently suffering with Depression. To explain this feeling is usually the though of some how not knowing that I dug myself into a hole and now gotten myself stuck inside. My efforts of trying to climb out of this hole (doing things to make me happy) has cause me to keep on falling back down (things going wrong or pessimistic thoughts) and just make it worst on my case. Because of this I have been lacking in content and creativity; this has also cause me with having problems with a few friends i keep in contact with, causing me to argue and be mad at one of them because I was getting envious and depress when I found them getting art of their ideas from others (when in the past I was more happy and was great to see). At first I though it was was because of financial security (not having a job that I could live off on), but after getting a job that "pays the bills" I discover my Depression was more than just that.
Now I'm not going to leave the channel or abandon this place (despite it already feeling like it) but I am going to try to do something to better help myself. Now I not going to get mediation cause it doesn't cure the sickness honestly nor does talking to a therapist. However these things will help hopefully get me out of my rut that I'm in.
- First is health, I feel I need to better myself by being active more often than I am ATM.
-Post shorter tfs and more fun ideas out more to test my skill and improve my art.
-Make a series I feel I like to work on and I will do it when ready.
-Making video game stream for Twitch and Youtube that doesn't bare the Octorber13 name
I hope you all can bare with me on this journey and I am sorry on what I did, I guess I was my cry for help
