So, I guess I just wanted to bump that last journal off my page... I don't want to seem like a beggar, and frankly, not many people responded anyway. I don't want that to come off in a bad way anyway, I know a lot of people are wary of gofundme's these days... But I figured, as my depression and condition are getting worse, I may as well tell my story to all those who are interested...

Sometime around February this year (2016), I started getting pain in my legs. Thinking it was just random aching as the seasons started turning towards the colder side of the spectrum (I'm in Australia, so our hot season was just ending), I just brushed it off. Admittedly, it left me with a limp, but whatever, I could deal with that. Skip forward a month, and that limp had grown more pronounced, to the point where I had to use a walking stick to get anywhere. It was at this point that I started seeing my GP (General Practitioner) about it. I was given painkillers and physiotherapy, but it didn't seem to help... Another month later, I was stuck in a wheelchair whenever I needed to leave the house. I could still drive, somehow, but anything more than 10-20m, I just couldn't walk. My GP was getting concerned, so I had a barrage of tests and scans done on me, all of which came back clear, much to our disdain... In addition to all my problems walking, I was starting to develop pain that was spreading all across my body, all my bones, joints and muscles were aching, and my skin would often feel like it was on fire. As well as this, I started getting severe exhaustion, to the point where, today, I can barely keep my mind focused on one thing for more than a couple of minutes, and I have to take frequent naps during the day, no matter how long I sleep in the evening...

While the diagnosis isn't official yet, both myself and my GP believe that I have both Fibromyalgia, a neurological condition that affects the way the brain processes pain signals throughout the body, as well as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, which does what it says on the tin. Both of these, while somewhat treatable, are ultimately incurable at this point in time...

This gradual process of losing my mobility and independence has been quite difficult for me to come to terms with, as is the constant pain that I am in. This has led to a quite severe depression, which is currently being treated... However, last week (as of writing this), I had an episode, where I hurt myself to the point where a concerned friend called an ambulance to my house... I spent quite a while in a mental health ward, before being eventually released.

And that leads now to me here now, today, writing this journal...


That is pretty much the whole story. If anyone has any questions, feel free to comment them here, or note me, if you don't feel comfortable commenting on the journal...

~Chloe