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A small problem of furry friends
9 years ago
It comes as no surprised that when you got buddies online, it's a good time, you get some great people that ya like. Even in a community like this, you can find some cool snazzy peeps, even if some tend to be way too open in the first few seconds you meet them. Generally getting friendly to the point where you can almost say whatever's on your mind or some person deep bullshit to them. Though in my experience, and with others from people I'm with or artist that I watch, that friendship like this can be a very dangerous thing to anyone online, though it can be extremely toxic especially with those who aren't...Well in the head. Or if they feel like the time they spent on you means you have to stay friends with them even if you don't.
A situation as vague as this is very hard to interpret, but I think a lot of you guys already know the danger of people on the internet, even more so in a place like this. Probably only second to what dA has. The worse part is finding out what kind of person that friend is when something small happens and it changes them completely into what they can really be like. It's a shock, something you couldn't expect to come out of this person. They might get really bitter or angry towards the situation, or worse, to you for something you couldn't control. You can't tell how someone should feel about it, but you feel as though you don't want to have someone that's a 'friend' to act like this. What do you do. Bare through it and see it to the end? Talk it out of them to see if they can relieve the situation out of their mind? What if they're stubborn about it and don't move even after months of working around it? Are they still worth it, or would it be best to think of them as 'toxic' to feel better about removing them everywhere.
Really, the worse part for a furry, at least I believe in my case, is how open you can be to leave no transparency between you and anyone out there that gets close to you. But somehow anything can set off a bad spark and suddenly you want nothing to do with them at all. It hits harder most likely because of the feel of wanting to show you trust the person, but in this hasty response, you found out the person doesn't trust you back.
Though if time was broken between them, will time heal the wound enough to wanna try the friendship thing again? Is it worth it? For those thinking on how good the intention would be to reconnect to an old friend, I pray you'd be more careful with the second round.
It's been a wild ride I gatta say. But hey, I'm glad to be where I am right now. No idea if anyone would read this huge journal but if you guys do, what would you do in the situation of a friend being irrational to something to the point of them being unfriendly towards you? If you took time apart from them long enough, would you try to go back to them and see if they're doing better?
A situation as vague as this is very hard to interpret, but I think a lot of you guys already know the danger of people on the internet, even more so in a place like this. Probably only second to what dA has. The worse part is finding out what kind of person that friend is when something small happens and it changes them completely into what they can really be like. It's a shock, something you couldn't expect to come out of this person. They might get really bitter or angry towards the situation, or worse, to you for something you couldn't control. You can't tell how someone should feel about it, but you feel as though you don't want to have someone that's a 'friend' to act like this. What do you do. Bare through it and see it to the end? Talk it out of them to see if they can relieve the situation out of their mind? What if they're stubborn about it and don't move even after months of working around it? Are they still worth it, or would it be best to think of them as 'toxic' to feel better about removing them everywhere.
Really, the worse part for a furry, at least I believe in my case, is how open you can be to leave no transparency between you and anyone out there that gets close to you. But somehow anything can set off a bad spark and suddenly you want nothing to do with them at all. It hits harder most likely because of the feel of wanting to show you trust the person, but in this hasty response, you found out the person doesn't trust you back.
Though if time was broken between them, will time heal the wound enough to wanna try the friendship thing again? Is it worth it? For those thinking on how good the intention would be to reconnect to an old friend, I pray you'd be more careful with the second round.
It's been a wild ride I gatta say. But hey, I'm glad to be where I am right now. No idea if anyone would read this huge journal but if you guys do, what would you do in the situation of a friend being irrational to something to the point of them being unfriendly towards you? If you took time apart from them long enough, would you try to go back to them and see if they're doing better?
Sorry you're in this dilemma.
Though I definitely agree with what you said on leaving someone who doesn't take you into consideration, cause lord knows we don't want someone as a friend who only thinks about their needs only.
I attribute it mostly to first appearance. People read based on the conditions or things they see or experience at a cold, first start. It is how we, humans or furries, are programmed to assess situations. From profile pictures, to descriptions, we glean a lot information from someone based on the first things we see, and if stuff is represented poorly, it can lead too misinformation. With that, comes the ease of misinterpreting a person or who they are.
It's easy to write someone off as "Toxic". I've had plenty of people that I've written off as just "Too much work", usually in a moment of need for them...that said, some people truly are toxic to be around. It all comes down too assessing the situation. Just remember that as nothing more than often just a small picture and a name, we must make clear out intentions (or lack there of) if we truly wish to avoid that.
It is incredibly easy to make a mistake. The hard part is working to reprimand it, and harder so is recognizing a mistake from repeated behavior.
My inbox is always open if you want to talk :).