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Status Update (Rollercoaster of emotion edition)
9 years ago
Depression
This has been hitting me kinda bad for the last month or two. It's chemical, not emotional (mostly, I've got a bit of a short fuse as of late), so it's more that it just knocks the wind outta my sails and I'm left low on energy, having a hard time sleeping, and it takes monumental effort to do damned-near anything productive, which leads me to...
Work Status
Slowed to a crawl. At this point I consider the week a success if I'm finishing as many pieces as I'm taking on that week, and the last couple weeks havent been very successful. I'm working on turning that around, but, well, the next section should explain this week at least...
Minyu
So, earlier in the week my cat, Minyu, got sick. He stopped eating and drinking, got lethargic, and on wednesday he needed to be taken into the vet. They found out he had an obstruction in his small intestine, likely from eating something he shouldn't have. They did surgery, managed to move the obstruction into the colon without opening up the intestine, and it looked like he was gonna be fine...
He wasn't.
His GI tract seized up and wouldnt start again, no matter how many drugs they gave him. Gas built up, but no matter how much they managed to vent, he was distended and in pain. He was in too much pain to eat, and even with the feeder tube in, he wasn't getting better. I think, deep down, he was done. 14 years ain't bad for a kitty. So yesterday, I had to make the most painful choice a pet owner has to make. It was raining when I went to see him for the last time
I spent time with him, brought his favorite brush, made him as comfortable as I could while we said our goodbyes. I told him over and over that everyone loved him (cuz anyone who met him did, and he loved them right back. Seriously, friendliest cat ever). He was trying to purr but it was coming out more like a weak gurgle. He seemed pretty peaceful when it was time for the injections. I was the last thing he heard or saw as I told him I was gonna miss him, crying the whole time.
The bittersweet part
I was still in the waiting room of the vet's office, still wiping the tears from my eyes, and noticing the sun had come out, when my sister called me. She'd just been at the hospital cuz she'd been throwing up for days.
.... I'm going to be an uncle. Talk about mood whiplash.
Perspective
The Universe was extremely kind to me yesterday. Yeah, I lost my long-time buddy, my little fuzzy feline son whom was so full of love and snuggles it was practically obnoxious. I would have kept him forever if I could, but the reaper comes for us all eventually. But the reaper was kind, and let me say goodbye, gave me a chance to do everything I could to save him, and we made sure his end was peaceful and gentle release. I got to say goodbye with a clear conscience.
The weather mirrored the mood, too. Rain turning to sunshine as my sister let me know she was pregnant. Real circle of life shit, when you think of it. Like something out of a disney movie or something. Dinner tasted amazing even though it was just drive thru. Even got treated to the spectacle of a shitload of bigass hawks flying around my apartment window, which is a bit of a new experience too.
I'm a really lucky guy. Fate was gentle with its necessities.
And back to work
I'm sure you guys won't mind if I take a couple days to recover from this rather unforgettable last few days, but after that, I'm gonna need to get back to work. The vet bill wasn't cheap.
If you're interested in a commission, leave a comment below, and I'll get to you. I take on a few every weekend.
Price is $185-$275 USD for a single character thigh-up, full colour, cost varying according to the detail involved
TLDR; Depressed, put my cat down yesterday, sister told me she's pregnant right after, life is crazy but in a good way
COMMISSIONS (the fullsize huge scenes, not the ones I'm doing nowadays)
1/ Rogern (inked, restarting colour)
2/ 9Lion (pencilled, plus one other)
3/ Mechaman
4/ Chazore (pencilled)
5/ yutrah (inked)
6/ rageki (inked)
7/ Twitch The Dragon (inked)
8/ Kipeo
9/ Opeoaslam
This has been hitting me kinda bad for the last month or two. It's chemical, not emotional (mostly, I've got a bit of a short fuse as of late), so it's more that it just knocks the wind outta my sails and I'm left low on energy, having a hard time sleeping, and it takes monumental effort to do damned-near anything productive, which leads me to...
Work Status
Slowed to a crawl. At this point I consider the week a success if I'm finishing as many pieces as I'm taking on that week, and the last couple weeks havent been very successful. I'm working on turning that around, but, well, the next section should explain this week at least...
Minyu
So, earlier in the week my cat, Minyu, got sick. He stopped eating and drinking, got lethargic, and on wednesday he needed to be taken into the vet. They found out he had an obstruction in his small intestine, likely from eating something he shouldn't have. They did surgery, managed to move the obstruction into the colon without opening up the intestine, and it looked like he was gonna be fine...
He wasn't.
His GI tract seized up and wouldnt start again, no matter how many drugs they gave him. Gas built up, but no matter how much they managed to vent, he was distended and in pain. He was in too much pain to eat, and even with the feeder tube in, he wasn't getting better. I think, deep down, he was done. 14 years ain't bad for a kitty. So yesterday, I had to make the most painful choice a pet owner has to make. It was raining when I went to see him for the last time
I spent time with him, brought his favorite brush, made him as comfortable as I could while we said our goodbyes. I told him over and over that everyone loved him (cuz anyone who met him did, and he loved them right back. Seriously, friendliest cat ever). He was trying to purr but it was coming out more like a weak gurgle. He seemed pretty peaceful when it was time for the injections. I was the last thing he heard or saw as I told him I was gonna miss him, crying the whole time.
The bittersweet part
I was still in the waiting room of the vet's office, still wiping the tears from my eyes, and noticing the sun had come out, when my sister called me. She'd just been at the hospital cuz she'd been throwing up for days.
.... I'm going to be an uncle. Talk about mood whiplash.
Perspective
The Universe was extremely kind to me yesterday. Yeah, I lost my long-time buddy, my little fuzzy feline son whom was so full of love and snuggles it was practically obnoxious. I would have kept him forever if I could, but the reaper comes for us all eventually. But the reaper was kind, and let me say goodbye, gave me a chance to do everything I could to save him, and we made sure his end was peaceful and gentle release. I got to say goodbye with a clear conscience.
The weather mirrored the mood, too. Rain turning to sunshine as my sister let me know she was pregnant. Real circle of life shit, when you think of it. Like something out of a disney movie or something. Dinner tasted amazing even though it was just drive thru. Even got treated to the spectacle of a shitload of bigass hawks flying around my apartment window, which is a bit of a new experience too.
I'm a really lucky guy. Fate was gentle with its necessities.
And back to work
I'm sure you guys won't mind if I take a couple days to recover from this rather unforgettable last few days, but after that, I'm gonna need to get back to work. The vet bill wasn't cheap.
If you're interested in a commission, leave a comment below, and I'll get to you. I take on a few every weekend.
Price is $185-$275 USD for a single character thigh-up, full colour, cost varying according to the detail involved
TLDR; Depressed, put my cat down yesterday, sister told me she's pregnant right after, life is crazy but in a good way
COMMISSIONS (the fullsize huge scenes, not the ones I'm doing nowadays)
1/ Rogern (inked, restarting colour)
2/ 9Lion (pencilled, plus one other)
3/ Mechaman
4/ Chazore (pencilled)
5/ yutrah (inked)
6/ rageki (inked)
7/ Twitch The Dragon (inked)
8/ Kipeo
9/ Opeoaslam
And congratulations Uncle!
Surely you will give presents to the little cutie :3
Just keep smiling and do what you can
On a brighter note congrats on becoming an uncle.
Congrats on becoming an uncle, though! That's such awesome news c:
Whenever you're feeling up to it, I would love to snag a commission from you!
Muzzle up. You'll get there.
So much so that reading your account of what happened almost got my own waterworks flowing, the experience was very similar. It's extremely difficult to let them go, but in the end it's for the best to end the suffering.
Not that I need to say it but, let it out, and it'll help in recovering. Take care Strype <3
And, if it's any consolation, I think the power of belief probably means that our own Reaperman is solidly modelled after the one Sir Terry Pratchett put on the page... and he is a big fan of cats;
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.co.....beced3af34.jpg
Are you still going to do the commissions listed in your last journal? Because I would still love to get something from you
My deepest sympathy for having to lose your friend like that, reading that physically upset me, despite not knowing your your cat! I don't know how I'd cope in your shoes having to do that, but at least now he's free from pain and 14 years is a damn good time. Rest in peace, little friend.
Big congrats for you and your sister! That sure is a crazy whip back to something a little better.
All in all, I hope things get better dude, that in time, you feel better and are happy enough to get back to doing what you love!
Take it easy mate.
Hopefully you becoming an uncle will help too.
As for work, I was told to inquire about a special on personal Smoke Launchers from you long ago...
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16272513/
Sorry for your loss. A pet is a hard thing to say goodbye to.
I still find myself being sad about my pupper. -hugs and love your way-
On that brighter side being an uncle will be fun! Been an aunt now for 17 years and I love my nieces to pieces :P
They grow up fast though so be ready to see the munchkin go from 1 to 10 in what feels like a year.
Also whenever you are back and ready to go, I'd love to get some arts from ya. Always gotten the FE pencil sketch versions, so a coloured one would be rad :Pay
Take your time and relax a bit. Good thoughts~
Never fear love, man.
It's strange how life works sometimes, huh?
I hope you do decide to get another cat, Strype. There's nothing quite like stroking a cat to ease depression.
Best of luck with the depression my friend, you are one of my greatest inspirations.
<3 stay strong, congratulations on being an uncle~ : )
Congrats on being an uncle. Tell your sister to try either the preggo pops or the wristbands to help with the nausea or just some plain ginger candy. I went thru similar issues and ugh...they suck!
I hear you on being depressed affecting your work - I've been dealing with a similar depression and my work output has dropped abysmally. I hate it. Tomorrow is the start of a new week though, so I'm hoping I can change things. I hope you can too~ :)
I lost my first cat to kidney failure, and I'm scared about my second cat cause he is pretty high up there in age around 13 or so.
Either way I hope you do well and get soon Strype!
But hey...there is a new life being formed now that you can spoil rotten once you get to meet them, thats something to be happy and excited about. :)
An perhaps in time you can adopt a new furry buddy to keep ya company.
Congrats on becoming an uncle. :)
But cheeres to you
Just keep steady man, i found a few changes in my life in the last 9 months, been a very interesting year, with ups and downs, so i feel ya.
Take the time, as the motion of the oceans; let the tide washout, when it comes back in it will be hella strong and you'll be right back to it.
miss you too bud ^^
The character I'd be commisioning is velociraptor-style, horizontal body, so for a side or three quarters I assume "thigh up" cuts most of the tail as well?
On a brighter note I'm still interested in a commission or 2. Character was in need of an update. And need a pic or 2 for that.
I shouldn't really do this but as before, fuck it.
Throw me in for your commission queue, buddy. You'll be drawing a rather robotic Tigress soon!
Reading something like that, from anyone, always makes me cry.
I have a pet cat myself, and I'm just dreading the day... I guess the fact that such things hurt shows you are capable of loving someone~?
At least there were some good news on the horizon at the same time
I'm interested in a commission and I can pay as well.
Congrats on being an Uncle.
Still love the work you did for me.
Keep hanging in there!
I understand that for an artist, mood swings have a bit more impact on the daily routine then for a book-keeper. So I hope things get better soon.
.....and as announced, I would like to get into your queue, no matter how long the waiting time is.
If it helps you can put me down for another commission when something opens up, I don't care what you draw with this one either you can do what you want. I got two or three others I'd eventually like to get from you but this meh whatever.
Hang in there Tiger!