I'm not shy about my mental illnesses, but I try very hard to not use them as an excuse. They are the reason for some of my reactions, but I'd like to think that I'm doing better & and can be mindful of when I'm having an episode or my anxiety is getting bad. If anybody is curious about what they are, I'm happy to answer polite questions.

I'm slipping into a really rough depression episode, with the end of a relationship, stress within the family, my seemingly never ending cycle of never being able to get out of debt nor get my license back, and not having a college education. This used to be my favorite time of year, and when I go outside, I do have little blips of "Yay, it's not balls hot!" but it's definitely not the excitement that the Autumn used to bring.

I'm frustrated and wanting to go back to school, but I am so overwhelmed that I don't know where to start. My sister is off in the Air Force, kicking ass. My brother is in the process of enlisting because he's ready to go. With as much as school costs, I'm thinking I'm better off going for a certification program to get a career started, & continue towards a degree. I qualify and was accepted into my dream school for my dream program...but it's just so expensive. I get the feeling I'm going to have to suck it up and just do the local community college.

I just don't know. I'm feeling very helpless, like I'm just spinning my wheels, so to speak.