Professor Summer's NFL Week 8 Best Bets
9 years ago
Hello sports fans! On Sunday the big spandex clad men will be back to concuss one another and shorten their life expectancies for your viewing enjoyment and my profit. Your favorite glasses and labcoat (and nothing else http://www.furaffinity.net/view/21125763/ new pic for 2016!) wearing skunkette has studied the spreads, and is here to give you the tip.
Home game tomorrow, leaving early cuz it's a big important one and my crew is going to do breakfast in the parking lot. Watch Deadspin.com for updates on crazy Bills fan behavior. Me? I'm driving, so I'll be taking it easy. SO, here are my picks. I've tried really analyzing the games, I've tried first reaction gut instinct picks....and nothing is working for me. This week I'm just going to have some fun and see what happens. Of course, when I'm behind, I tend to bet more to catch up....soo....yeah more bonus picks this week.
Game 1 - Oakland Raiders (-1) @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers
The pick: Oakland -1
~Oakland has proven themselves to be a west coast team that travels well. I also think that they are better than the Buccaneers, so I do not believe the travel will be enough of a factor to set them back. If Oakland can keep Jameis Winston from hurting them, they should be able to take care of biz.
RESULT _ Oakland 30 (-1 = 29) Tampa Bay 24
CORRECT
Game 2 - New York Jets @ Cleveland Browns (+2)
The Pick - Cleveland +2
~Last week I picked Cleveland to get their first win or at least come close to doing so against Cincinnati. Didn't happen. Cleveland it better than their 0-7 record, and they won't go winless the whole season. This one looks like a game they can pull out. New York went so far as to bench Ryan Fitzpatrick a week ago, only for Geno Smith to get injured. Soooo Fitz was sent back in, and he's starting again this week. They lose here and the free fall really begins.
Fucking Browns blew a 20-3 halftime lead
RESULT - Cleveland 28 (+2 = 30) NY Jets 31
WRONG
Game 3 - Detroit Lions (+1) @ Houston Texans
The Pick - Detroit +1
~Detroit has quietly been a competent and fun team to watch. Matt Stafford is having a career year. Houston is on a short week after a monday night exposing by the Denver Broncos. This is a case of taking the better team with a bonus point. Simple as that.
RESULT = Detroit 13 (-1 = 12) Houston 20
WRONG
State of Summer's Buffalo Bills.
~I had a hunch that Buffalo would lose last week at Miami. Injured players and overconfidence were both factors, as was the sun and heat of southern Florida. Did you know that the Dolphin's stadium is designed so that the visiting team's sideline is in full on sun all game, even when in the 4th quarter the field is shaded? Brilliant.
This week the injury report isn't looking any better than it was last week. And coming to town are the New England Fuckbois, who are undefeated save for a game against Buffalo earlier this season. The Fuckbois do not like being beat, especially when in that game they were without Tom Brady. On top of that, Buffalo disrespected them, starting a scuffle before the game even started. New England is already a team that likes to run up the score to send a message (that's why I call them the Fuckbois). So take that and factor in their added motivation, and we have a game that could be well over by halftime. Even with a three score lead, New England will keep trying to score, they want to send a message to Buffalo and the league that they are the AFC stone cold locks.
so...
BONUS PICKS
New England Fuckbois (-6) @ Buffalo Bills Over/Under 47
The Picks New England -6
& Combined Score OVER 47
RESULT New England 41 (-6 = 35) Buffalo 25
AND 41+25= 66 OVER 47
CORRECT/CORRECT
Season Results (so far) 10 correct, 16 wrong, 1 push.
Home game tomorrow, leaving early cuz it's a big important one and my crew is going to do breakfast in the parking lot. Watch Deadspin.com for updates on crazy Bills fan behavior. Me? I'm driving, so I'll be taking it easy. SO, here are my picks. I've tried really analyzing the games, I've tried first reaction gut instinct picks....and nothing is working for me. This week I'm just going to have some fun and see what happens. Of course, when I'm behind, I tend to bet more to catch up....soo....yeah more bonus picks this week.
Game 1 - Oakland Raiders (-1) @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers
The pick: Oakland -1
~Oakland has proven themselves to be a west coast team that travels well. I also think that they are better than the Buccaneers, so I do not believe the travel will be enough of a factor to set them back. If Oakland can keep Jameis Winston from hurting them, they should be able to take care of biz.
RESULT _ Oakland 30 (-1 = 29) Tampa Bay 24
CORRECT
Game 2 - New York Jets @ Cleveland Browns (+2)
The Pick - Cleveland +2
~Last week I picked Cleveland to get their first win or at least come close to doing so against Cincinnati. Didn't happen. Cleveland it better than their 0-7 record, and they won't go winless the whole season. This one looks like a game they can pull out. New York went so far as to bench Ryan Fitzpatrick a week ago, only for Geno Smith to get injured. Soooo Fitz was sent back in, and he's starting again this week. They lose here and the free fall really begins.
Fucking Browns blew a 20-3 halftime lead
RESULT - Cleveland 28 (+2 = 30) NY Jets 31
WRONG
Game 3 - Detroit Lions (+1) @ Houston Texans
The Pick - Detroit +1
~Detroit has quietly been a competent and fun team to watch. Matt Stafford is having a career year. Houston is on a short week after a monday night exposing by the Denver Broncos. This is a case of taking the better team with a bonus point. Simple as that.
RESULT = Detroit 13 (-1 = 12) Houston 20
WRONG
State of Summer's Buffalo Bills.
~I had a hunch that Buffalo would lose last week at Miami. Injured players and overconfidence were both factors, as was the sun and heat of southern Florida. Did you know that the Dolphin's stadium is designed so that the visiting team's sideline is in full on sun all game, even when in the 4th quarter the field is shaded? Brilliant.
This week the injury report isn't looking any better than it was last week. And coming to town are the New England Fuckbois, who are undefeated save for a game against Buffalo earlier this season. The Fuckbois do not like being beat, especially when in that game they were without Tom Brady. On top of that, Buffalo disrespected them, starting a scuffle before the game even started. New England is already a team that likes to run up the score to send a message (that's why I call them the Fuckbois). So take that and factor in their added motivation, and we have a game that could be well over by halftime. Even with a three score lead, New England will keep trying to score, they want to send a message to Buffalo and the league that they are the AFC stone cold locks.
so...
BONUS PICKS
New England Fuckbois (-6) @ Buffalo Bills Over/Under 47
The Picks New England -6
& Combined Score OVER 47
RESULT New England 41 (-6 = 35) Buffalo 25
AND 41+25= 66 OVER 47
CORRECT/CORRECT
Season Results (so far) 10 correct, 16 wrong, 1 push.
FA+

They give them ammo OVER and OVER again.