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A personal reflection, and open apology.
9 years ago
General
This is the journal header. Nothing to see here, get to reading the actual journal yah goof!
Some may have noticed that the last few days my account was temporarily suspended. This is NOT going to get into details about it, or whine about it, or whatever else. It was justified. However that context does give me a good starting point for a bit of self reflection and hopefully the opportunity to set some things right.
My forced time away from FurAffinity, this massive hub for furry activity, turned out to be a really good thing. Not simply for slapping me on the wrist but because it's given me an opportunity to think about myself, and how I stand and present myself within this little community of ours here on this website.
In my time here on FA I've tried my best to be a nice person, to be amicable and civil. But we are all people, and of course people make mistakes. I have made mistakes. I always approach new people with the hopes that we can go forward on good terms, even being able to agree to disagree with no hard feelings. Sometimes however you make a mistake. You say something that you feel is innocuous but, next thing you know you're upset someone or offended them or whatever else, even if it was an accident and that wasn't your intention.
I have no qualms admitting that has happened because of me, those are things I have done. I want to bring people closer and spread peace and goodwill...however with some I've managed to do the exact opposite, instead driving a wedge between us and pushing them away from me (not maliciously or with the intent of doing so however). And you know how things can be, something small can get out of control and the next thing you know you're at each other's throats and you hate each other or....something similar. Regardless of the context you go away from it all feeling bitter, and scornful.
While I don't feel things to that extreme, my time away and a little self reflection made me realise something. What's the point of holding a grudge? It solves nothing and only weighs on your mind whenever you have a moment idle and let your mind wander on it's own.
Realising that I've decided to ditch my dumb pride (I mean what does pride get you? nothing), and cast off the shackles of pointless, petty grudges. I hold no further qualms with anybody. Keep this in mind as you read further.
No longer do I want to push people away, and I would like to take this opportunity to openly apologise:
To anybody whom in the past I may have upset, offended, or caused any sort of grievance, I am very sorry for my past actions. Whatever it is I might have done to you, please know that if it caused you to have a negative experience in anyway that I didn't want that.
If you would like to take up the offer, I can personally apologise on a one-to-one basis. My block list is now empty. No longer will I hold any qualms or issue with anyone. If you would allow me the opportunity to set things right, settle our differences and go forward in peace then I am willing to participate in that. If however you would rather keep your distance from me, then that is perfectly understandable and like I said, I take no issue with that course of action. Just know my open apology is here.
I'm not openly referring to anyone with any specificity, I've already breached the Terms of Service and Code of Conduct once I don't wish to do so again so I've kept this journal free of names and ambiguous on purpose.
You have my thanks for reading this personal reflection of mine. To anyone reading I hope our future interactions are amicable, civil, and above all enjoyable.
Take care now. Much love and appreciation.
-Simone
ChristopherDavies
~christopherdavies
This is well written. I'm glad you've had time to reflect!
xiekon
~xiekon
OP
Often you come out feeling better about yourself, and go forward a better person. That's what I hoped to achieve
ChristopherDavies
~christopherdavies
True. If someone gets on my nerves, I'll ask them to stop. If that doesn't work then I'll give them a warning. If that doesn't work, I'll send them a note explaining the repercussions and wait for a response befor I temporaily block them for a month. I'll slowly lengthen it if they harrass me. I haven't blocked anyone pernamently yet.
xiekon
~xiekon
OP
I did block people permanently, but...well actually I don't need to repeat the reasons why I unblocked them it's in the journal x3
ChristopherDavies
~christopherdavies
Well, yeah! Everyone deserves a 2nd chance!
xiekon
~xiekon
OP
Indeed and that's a far better attitude than holding grudges I've found. I'd like to make amends with those people, but if they don't want to then I won't hold them to it. That's their decision.
ChristopherDavies
~christopherdavies
Of course!
